Wednesday, October 31, 2001
The Jacks Residence -- 10:45am
Brenda looked at her watch for the fourth time in the past ten minutes as she sat on the chair in the living room. She pulled back the drapes in the living room and watched for Julia's car. A moment later, Brenda saw the champagne colored convertible enter the circular driveway. Brenda rose from the chair and moved into the foyer. She opened the front door just as Julia began walking up the marble steps which had been lined with the small pumpkins Jillian had picked during the pumpkin patch trip. The crisp wind rustled the corn fodder that had been tied around the pillars of the house to make haystacks for Halloween.
She studied Julia's expression and Brenda immediately recognized the slightly dazed look on Julia's face. It had been the same expression Brenda had seen on her own face when she had looked into the mirror sixteen months ago after beginning her sessions with Melanie. When Julia came inside, Brenda uttered no words but simply hugged Julia as tightly as she could. After a few minutes, Brenda released Julia from her embrace and then took Julia's hand to guide her into the living room. Brenda sat down next to Julia on the sofa and then handed her a wad of tissue. "It's okay, you don't have to say anything." She whispered to Julia as she brushed back the blonde hair from Julia's face. "I'm just going to sit here with you."
Julia nodded her head as a fresh stream of tears flowed from hers eyes. Her head was pounding and Julia's nose and eyes were red from this morning's deluges of tears which were likely to continue well into the afternoon. Julia blew her nose and tried to catch her breath as she leaned her head against the back of the sofa.
Brenda stroked Julia's arm. "I'm right here, Julia."
"I know and I'm sorry." Julia dabbed the tissue around the corners of her eyes. "You should be resting, not watching me fall apart."
"Stop!" Brenda exhaled deeply as she held Julia's hand. "You were there for me when I thought darkness was the only thing I would ever see and now I'm going to be there for you."
She choked back her sobs as Brenda hugged her again. Corrine appeared in the doorway to see if she could be of any help and Brenda smiled in gratitude and then mouthed a request for some tea. While Corrine went to the kitchen, Brenda continued to gently rub Julia's back. When Julia regained her composure, Brenda squeezed her hand and flashed her a reassuring smile.
Julia took a few deep breaths and massaged her throbbing temple. "This has been some morning."
"I know, honey." Brenda touched the sleeve of Julia's coat. "Let me take your coat and you can try to get your bearings."
Julia looked down and realized that she still was wearing her coat. She stood up and Brenda helped Julia out of her coat. Corrine then came into the living with the tea Josee had brewed. Josee had steeped a pot of wild jasmine tea, Julia's favorite, and Corrine placed the tray on the coffee table in front of the sofa. Brenda thanked Corrine and then Corrine left the living room to give the sisters some time alone.
Brenda poured a cup of tea and handed it to Julia. "Maybe this will help."
Her hands shook slightly as Julia took a sip of the soothing libation. Julia looked at Brenda and saw the worry lines on her forehead. "I shouldn't have come, I did not mean to upset you."
A small sigh fell from Brenda's lips. "There's nothing that is going to stop me from worrying about you."
Julia placed her cup and saucer back on the tray. "You're supposed to be resting this week and keeping your blood pressure down, not getting upset about me."
"Do you think my blood pressure is really going to decrease sitting here not knowing how you are?" Brenda shook her head. "I don't think so, I wanted you here."
"Brenda, I know your blood pressure was up when you went to see Lynn Meadows two days ago." Julia exhaled sharply. "You need to concentrate on you."
She patted Julia's hand. "I'm all right, Lynn just wanted me to take it easy this week. Alan came over this morning and my blood pressure was lower and Jax and Maggie are taking and picking up Jillian from school this week." Brenda's eyes met Julia's. "That's enough about me, what about you?"
Julia's voice trembled as she spoke. "Besides falling apart?"
Brenda's face brightened. "Sometimes falling apart is the only way to put all the pieces back together again."
"Oh my," she replied with an extended sigh. "You really do sound like Melanie."
A muffled laugh escaped from Brenda's lips. "We've spent a lot of time together over the past sixteen months." Her expression then became serious. "More importantly, it's firsthand knowledge."
"I don't know if I can do this." Julia wiped away a tear which had crept from her eye.
"You can," Brenda responded in a reassuring tone. "Take it from someone who shattered into a million pieces and never thought she could be put back together again."
Julia swallowed the lump in her throat. "This is even harder than I thought it would be. Two sessions with Melanie and I can't stop crying."
"Melanie listened to me cry for five sessions before I could catch my breath long enough to string two sentences together." Brenda looked directly at Julia as she continued. "You need to get all your feelings out."
Julia nodded. "I know, I just didn't realize how much it would hurt."
Brenda's voice was filled with emotion. "I'm sorry you're in so much pain." She reached out and took Julia's hand. "I wish it didn't have to be this way, but it does."
"One day it will get easier, won't it?" Julia's question had a pleading undertone to it.
She squeezed Julia's hand. "One day, but not today. Not tomorrow, either honey."
Julia closed her eyes as she rested her head against the back of the couch. "Melanie said no self-imposed timetables. What a concept for the woman who has had a day planner since she was thirteen years old."
"You're going to learn a lot about yourself. Some things you will like, and some you may not." Brenda tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "But then you'll have everything you need to move forward."
"That's what I'm most afraid of," Julia paused for a moment before continuing. "What if I don't even like myself when it's over? Or what if...."
"...Jerry doesn't?" Brenda finished Julia's thought.
Julia exhaled slowly. "What if he doesn't even recognize me?"
"He'll recognize you at every turn." A smile formed on Brenda's lips. "Jerry has been able to see parts of you that you never even knew existed. And he loves all of you."
"I don't know how." Julia let out a jagged breath. "I've messed things up so much."
"Then you'll work to fix them." Brenda then continued in a confident tone. "And then you and Jerry can work together."
Another look of sadness covered Julia's face. "Remember, not a word about this to Jerry. Or to Jane or John. I won't pressure him into anything."
Brenda nodded her head in understanding. "I promise and Jax knows your wishes as well."
A soft sigh passed from Julia's lips. "I need to figure out some answers first." Her shoulders sagged slightly. "At this point, I don't even know when he is coming back into town. He left two days ago with no notice and barely a word to anyone."
"He'll be back." Brenda touched Julia's hand. "And you can talk to him when you feel comfortable doing so."
"Jerry hasn't been involved directly on the inspection of those oil rigs in three years." Julia chewed her bottom lip. "Some of those offshore sites are in such treacherous locations."
Brenda rubbed Julia's hand between her own two hands. "He's much too stubborn to let an offshore oil rig cause him any problems." She met Julia's glance. "Maybe Jerry simply needed to get away for a few days to clear his head."
Julia grimaced slightly. "Everything is so muddled now."
"For both of you." Brenda's eyes sparkled as she continued. "And when the time is right, you and Jerry will make some sense of it all. Now you both are still searching for answers." She met Julia's gaze. "That's what life and love are all about."
Julia looked at the radiance shining from Brenda's face and something about it provided a small comfort. "I thought it was the older sisters who were supposed to have the answers."
She flashed Julia a lopsided grin. "Another myth dispelled?"
"Brenda..." Julia hesitated as she moistened her dry lips. "I don't know how to tell you how grateful I am."
"You just did," Brenda murmured as she handed Julia the cup of tea again.
Julia took a few sips of the comforting drink. "I love you, Brenda. Don't ever forget that."
"I won't." Brenda spoke in a hushed voice. "And I love you very much. We all do."
A lone tear trickled down Julia's cheek. "I know and it has kept me going thus far."
"And it will continue to do so," Brenda replied. "It took me almost twenty five years and an incredible man to understand how powerful love can be and I know it is going to guide you as well."
This time it was Julia who reached out to hug Brenda. The two sisters sat there together in each other's embraces and both Julia and Brenda were extremely grateful for the power of love and sisterly ties.
The Jacks Residence -- 8:30pm
Brenda was stretched out on the couch in the den while Lady slept beside the coffee table. As the mantel clock chimed at half past the hour, the dog's ears perked up at the sound of the garage door opening. Brenda smiled as she sat up against the arm of the couch. "Lady, guess who's home from the party?"
The dog quickly trotted out of the den to await Jax and Jillian's entrance into the house. Two minutes later, the front door opened and Jillian bounded inside swinging her pumpkin shaped bucket. Lady yipped and Jillian giggled as Jax closed the door behind them. She patted the dog's head and then Jillian looked around and squealed. "Where are you, Mommy?"
"I'm right here, sweetie," Brenda responded as she appeared in the hallway. "Come tell me all about the party."
The pale pink ballet slippers on Jillian's feet made small thuds on the carpeted hall floor as she scampered toward Brenda. "Mommy, see all my candy."
Brenda bent down and hugged Jillian. "Oh my goodness, look at all of that candy." She took Jillian's hand and they walked into the den. "Did you have a good time at the party?"
Jillian bobbed her head up and down. "Oh yeess, Mommy. It was sooo fun."
"I'm so glad." Brenda sat down on the couch and helped Jillian off with her jacket. "Did you thank Aunt Ruby for having such a fun party for all the children?"
"Uh-huh," Jillian replied with a nod of her head. "I remembered before Daddy told me."
Jax and Lady came into the den and he winked at Jillian. "Yes, you were a very good girl and remembered."
"Thank you Jillian." Brenda caressed Jillian's cheek. "It was very nice of Aunt Ruby to have a Halloween party."
Jax walked over to the couch and kissed Brenda softly on the mouth. He then lifted Jillian into his arms and sat down beside Brenda with Jillian in his lap. "Now Mommy, Jillian and I want to know if you were a good girl and had a quiet evening?"
Brenda gave him a mock salute. "Yes, sir, I postponed the marathon and the steeplechase races for the evening and opted to listen to the dog snore."
A smirk was plastered on his face. "Then Lady more than earned her keep for the night." At the sound of her name, the dog lifted her head from the carpet and Jax addressed her. "Remind me to give you an extra biscuit tonight, girl."
Brenda rolled her eyes slightly at Jax which only caused him to chuckle. She elbowed him in response and then spoke to Jillian. "Now tell me everything you did tonight?"
Jillian rubbed her hands excitedly as she beamed at Brenda. "Played games and ate hot dogs and saw ghosts."
"Ghosts? You saw ghosts?" She smiled at Jillian. "Were they nice ghosts?"
"Oh, yes, they gave me candy." Jillian then looked up at Jax. "And Daddy said they were just pretend ghosts, and the witches were pretend too."
Jax nodded his head. "That's right, just pretend ghosts and witches."
Jillian leaned over and whispered to Brenda. "And I know a secret about the ghosts."
"You do?" A huge grin covered Brenda's face at the sight of the brightness on Jillian's face.
Jillian's hand covered her mouth as she giggled. "Emily was a ghost, she showed me and Brooke."
"Emily was a ghost?" Brenda tweaked Jillian's nose. "Did she give you candy too?"
A soft shriek came from Jillian's lips. "Candy and this." She dipped her hand into the pumpkin bucket and pulled out a caramel-covered apple. "Grandma Lila said Emily could give this to me."
"That looks so delicious," Brenda murmured as she unconsciously licked her lips. "Grandma Lila remembered how much you love caramel apples."
Jillian rubbed her stomach and smacked her lips together. "Yummy apple."
Brenda took the apple and put it back into the bucket. "You can have some tomorrow after dinner. No more sugar tonight, it's late."
She sighed softly. "Mommy, do I have to take off my ballerina dress now?"
"In a few more minutes." Brenda patted Jillian's hand. "Halloween is just about over."
"Oohh," Jillian murmured and then exhaled deeply. "I like Halloween."
"I know, sweetie, but there will be another one next year." She rubbed Jillian's back. "And Daddy took your picture so we can send Grandmom and Grandpa one to see how you pretty you looked."
A smile lit up Jillian's face again. "And Uncle Jerry too when the plane comes home."
Jax shifted Jillian on his lap. "Yes, Uncle Jerry would love to see you in your ballerina outfit when he comes back from Alaska next week."
"I know how to pump now." Jillian moved her right hand in front of her and pumped it up and down.
A curious expression covered Brenda's face. "What are you pumping, sweetie?"
"The oil to help Grandpa." She responded nonchalantly. "Grandpa says I can help pump all the oil since Uncle Jerry is old now."
"I'll be sure to tell Uncle Jerry that when I meet him in California next week." Jax chuckled as he rubbed his hands together. "This will be perfect, we can put him out to pasture now."
"Pasture with the horses, Daddy?" Jillian had a curious look on her face. "But you said Uncle Jerry was too scared of the horses and I don't want him to be scared."
Brenda arched her right eyebrow and muttered to him. "Jax, enough." She then cleared her throat and changed the subject. "Jillian, did you like being a ballerina tonight?"
"Yes, Mommy, I wanna dance like a ballerina." Jillian turned her head to gaze up at Jax. "Mommy says when I'm bigger, the teacher can show me."
Jax tickled the skin under Jillian's chin. "If you want to try to dance like a ballerina when you get bigger, you can go to ballet class."
"Just like Mommy when she was little like me." Jillian bit her bottom lip in enthusiasm. "Mommy has her ballet slippers in the closet."
Brenda bobbed her head as a devilish glint shined in her eyes. "Then after ballet, we can practice yoga." She smugly smiled at Jax. "Daddy too, he loves yoga."
Jillian clapped her hands together as Jax glared at Brenda. "Oh, Daddy, we can all practice."
Brenda cleared her throat in an effort to control her mirth. "Upstairs on Mommy and Daddy's bed would be a perfect place to practice, right, Daddy?"
Jax shook his head slightly at Brenda's effective retaliation to his overzealous concern for her and his sarcasm about Jerry. She was one of the few people he had ever met that could successfully counter his every move and that fact alone had captivated him from the start. Jax tipped his head to her. "Point made, Mrs. Jacks."
Brenda tipped her head in return. "Smart man, Mr. Jacks." She then smiled at Jillian. "We'll see about ballet in the spring if you still want to learn and we'll wait to talk about yoga." Brenda then made eye contact with Jax. "For now, that is."
She bobbed her head in understanding. "Mommy, I forgot to tell Daddy about the box." Jillian put her hand on Jax's chest. "Daddy, me and Mommy went to the store to find ballet slippers and we saw a box with a little ballerina that was sooo pretty."
Jax smiled to himself at the eagerness in Jillian's voice. She sounded just like her mother about the little treasures of life. "A ballerina box?"
"Uh-huh, Daddy." Jillian sighed softly. "The music made the little ballerina twirl around and around."
Jax exchanged a glance with Brenda as he responded to Jillian. "That sounds very pretty, Jillian."
Jillian was not quite finished about the subject. "Mommy said maybe Santa Claus would bring it to me for Christmas if I was extra good. It is so pretty."
"You can put it on your list and maybe Santa Claus will bring it for you." Jax flashed her a lopsided grin. "But tonight, you are the beautiful ballerina in this house, princess."
Jillian coyly smiled as she touched the top of her head where Brenda had piled her curls into a twist. "Aunt Felicia said my hair was pretty."
"It is." Jax's eyes glistened as he smiled at Jillian. "Your hair looks just like Mommy's."
She beamed as she reached out to take a piece of Brenda's hair. "Mommy's hair is soft." Jillian then dramatically sniffed the strand of Brenda's hair. "And smells pretty."
Brenda unfastened the clips on Jillian's head and took a curl between her fingers. "Your hair is soft too." She then inhaled in the scent of Jillian's hair which had been washed during her bath before the party this evening. "And it smells so pretty too."
Jillian laughed out loud as she leaned over and brushed her cheek against Brenda's face. "Me and Mommy's hair is twins."
Brenda's laughter then came too and Jax felt his heart flip-flop in his chest at the sights and sounds before him. His two princesses in all their glory. They had the same laugh, the same button nose, the same silky tresses and the same hold on his heart. And Jax knew if he spent the next thousand years watching them together, his heart would still flutter at the vision as if it were the first time he had ever seen them together. And the value of all the oil in the world could never begin to compare to even one glimmer of that vision.
Wednesday, November 7, 2001
The Jacks Jet -- 5:30pm
The jet moved through the Mountain Time zone as the aircraft made its return flight to Port Charles. The snowcapped Rocky Mountains were barely visible below as darkness descended upon the evening sky. The three days of negotiations had finally come to a successful close and all Jax wanted to do was to get home. Jerry had flown into the Carmel area early this morning from Fairbanks to join Jax in the announcement of J & J Jacks' acquisition of the largest shipping fleet in the Pacific. After the documents had been executed and the press conference had been held, Jax and Jerry had headed straight to the Monterey Airport to return home.
As the cabin lights dimmed, Jax loosened his tie and relaxed against the chestnut leather seat. Jerry sat on the other side of the plane at the window and Jax watched him from across the aisle. Except with regard to the final details of the acquisition, they had barely had a chance to talk since Jerry's arrival this morning but Jax had noticed the often pensive looks on Jerry's face. Such an expression covered Jerry's face now as he stared out the window into the darkening evening sky.
Behind those meditative looks, Jerry's eyes were filled with pain and confusion. Those looks had been basically foreign to Jerry until the recent months and Jax remembered how taken aback he had been the first time he had seen the uncertainty on his brother's face. From the earliest moment that Jax could remember, Jerry had been the embodiment of confidence and invulnerability. He had been the omnipotent and infallible older brother that Jax had loved and who had loved Jax back with a vengeance. Before Jax was astute enough to understand her words, he had overheard Jane joyously exclaim that Jerry's devotion to Jax was proof positive of just how much love that Jerry's heart had to offer.
Jane's belief had proven to be fact, although it had taken years for Jax to fully comprehend the nature of it. It had taken Jerry even longer to concede that he had no control over his own heart. Surrender had never been part of Jerry's vocabulary but the admission had finally been made to those closest to him. To most of the outside world, Jerry's facade had been successful in concealing the true essence of the man within. There had been a few momentary slips along the way but overall, Jerry had been judged to be as heartless and as ruthless as the day was long. Stoicism was his middle name as emotions were considered an alien concept to Jerry.
Even Jax had never fully understood the true pretense of the disguise until almost two years after the explosion at the opal mines. After the trip to the Grand Tetons when he had slipped and dangled against the rocky cliff, Jax had immersed himself in the corporate raider game. He did not see Jerry again for months and when Jax did, something was different. There had been a glint of intense sadness in Jerry's eyes that had never before existed. When Jax had tried to question Jerry about the emotion, Jerry had immediately quashed any such discussion.
Jax had heard rumors of the existence of a special woman in Jerry's life but Jax had been skeptical of such gossip knowing Jerry's aversion to even the word "relationship." However it soon became abundantly clear to Jax that Jerry was waging an internal battle and that there was some merit to the murmurings about the woman who had been in Jerry's life. Jax had never brought up the issue again but six months and a bottle of tequila later, Jerry's rambling confirmed to Jax that Jerry had lost control of his heart. Jerry had viewed that as a direct attack against himself and had countered with a crushing blow to the enemy. In the end, that retaliation had only served to shatter two hearts and Jerry had pledged to himself that a repeat of such would never occur.
In the eight years since those drunken musings, not one word about the subject had been discussed between the brothers. Jerry had donned the public mask again and for years, it had been affixed to him like glue. Jerry's veil of heartlessness and dispassion was no longer visible to Jax as he had seen and heard the anguish Jerry had felt and now finally discerned the true meaning of Jane's words from years before. As successful as Jerry's disguise had been during those years, Jax was not the only one to whom the illusion of Jerry's mask had been exposed. Brenda had seen through the facade immediately and much to Jerry's chagrin, she had never failed to remind him of that fact. The image of Brenda then seeped into his head and Jax's face lit up. As his heart fluttered in his chest, Jax closed his eyes to fully enjoy the visions.
Jerry shifted in his seat and caught a glimpse of Jax out of the corner of his eye. An elongated sigh fell from Jerry's lips at the sight. "There's the `Brenda look' again," Jerry murmured to himself. As lucrative as his holdings were, Jerry knew he would be a much wealthier man if he had a dollar for every time he had seen that look on Jax's face. One look at Brenda or one mere thought of her would cause Jax's face to light up a room. Jerry had first seen the "Brenda look" within the first five minutes of meeting her. After the maddening woman had bested him at his game of flirtation and left him gasping for air after her surprise kiss, Jerry had heard Jax's hysterical laughter and then seen the "Brenda look" plastered all over his face. Jerry had wanted to immediately punch Jax in the mouth to knock some sense into him. No little brother of his was supposed to be so captivated by any woman. That was pure sacrilege to Jerry's credo.
It only became worse from that moment on. Jerry's attempts at brotherly guidance were completely ignored as Jax had no desire to be anywhere but surrounded by Brenda's charms. Brenda wore her own version of the spellbound expression and it appeared on her face every time she even heard Jax's name. Between the "Jax look" and the "Brenda look," Jerry felt as if he was in the midst of some hypnotic trance whenever they were all together. Jerry expected to one day turn around to find motion picture cameras all around him capturing the images of the enchanted pair for some sappy romance movie that the sentimentalists craved. It was pure torture at times but not for the reasons Jerry expected and that was the most distressing aspect of the entire situation.
Jerry turned his head again and looked out the window into the shadowy sky. It was still impossible to know when things had changed and he had begun viewing Jax and Brenda's life together in a different vain. He had always wanted Jax to be happy and it was clear that Brenda was an instrument to that so Jerry had almost immediately given up his brotherly counsel to Jax about being mesmerized by the bewitching sorceress. Brenda was as protective of Jax as Jerry had ever been and even amidst the sentimental mush, Jerry could see how much she genuinely loved his brother. With that, Jerry had considered Brenda an ally from the beginning even though she had forced him to face things about himself that he never before admitted.
In those early times, Jerry had been at such a loss in trying to determine just how Brenda had realized the conflict that he was facing as he watched her happiness with Jax. Jerry did not understand it himself as he felt the stir of emotions that he never knew existed within him. The love and devotion Jerry saw between them had become contagious and his heart had become infected. As hard as he had tried, Jerry could not get away from the emotion that was brewing inside him. Brenda met him at every turn as a barrier to his own escape route. She was the most exasperating woman he had ever met. Well, at least until Julia entered his life.
Jax opened his eyes again and glanced across the cabin. He saw that Jerry was still staring out the window, and Jax knew that Jerry was battling with his own thoughts at that moment. Jax could only imagine what Brenda would be doing now had she been sitting in the plane. He had watched in amazement at her past attempts to have Jerry confront his innermost feelings. Jerry had fought her all the way but Brenda had succeeded more times than not at forcing Jerry to open himself up to his own emotions. Brenda had seen through Jerry's protective armor within the first hour of their initial meeting and she had never hidden that fact from him. She had seen the depth and inherence of Jerry's love for Jax from that first instant and the mask had immediately lost its effect on her. It was that night as well that Brenda realized that Jerry Jacks was always going to have a special part in her heart. He was arrogant and brash and an incorrigible scoundrel at times but Brenda knew Jerry loved Jax with every fiber of his heart and that was all that mattered.
As the jet continued on toward Port Charles, Jax rested his head against the soft leather of the seat. A broad grin covered his face at the memories of Jerry's valiant attempts to avoid Brenda's intervention into his emotional state. The efforts were noble, but terribly unsuccessful all the same, as Brenda had triumphed at every turn. Jax had been a very entertained spectator as he had proudly watched Brenda rebut any counter move Jerry had employed. Jax had never seen his brother so powerless against an opposing force but Brenda had been able to slowly chisel away at Jerry's facade. At the same time, Jax could see the growing respect and adoration that Jerry and Brenda had for one another and that fact tugged at Jax's heartstrings like little else had ever done before.
Once Jillian had entered their lives, Jerry had become even more vulnerable to his own heart and emotions. Between Brenda's tactical badgering and Jillian's contagious smiles, Jerry's defenses were worthless but he still refused to admit surrender. In one of his more exasperating moments with Brenda, Jerry had accused her of brainwashing Jillian for use in the recruitment campaign against him. Brenda had simply shrugged as she told Jerry that he had not even begun to comprehend the force of the mother and daughter combination.
The heavy artillery had not been pulled out as of yet as Brenda was awaiting the perfect moment to unveil the last and most important part of her plans. The timing of that unveiling was also dependent upon the other player (albeit unknowingly) in Brenda's plan. Julia had to be in a position to start facing her own feelings then as well. Brenda had been convinced from the start that both Jerry and Julia's hearts had each been searching for the other even if neither was ready to admit that to themselves or to each other. Jax had worried at times that Brenda had become too invested in her hopes about Jerry and Julia but Brenda's convictions would not be discouraged. Jane was of the same mind set so it was a futile battle against the two women Jax loved most in the world. In the end, Jax was willingly in the audience as it anxiously awaited the start of the production.
Finally, the curtain went up a few months later as the stage had finally been set and Jerry and Julia began the first scene together in their own romantic melodrama. They had stumbled at times and fallen back into their former characters but the production had moved forward. There had also been the anticipated debating back and forth as to whom would play the lead role in each scene but Julia and Jerry had eventually learned to share center stage. Of course they had spent too much time reaching the finale in terms of Brenda's way of thinking but the raving reviews had made it worth the wait.
Jax sighed deeply as he turned his head and caught a glimpse of the anguish in Jerry's eyes, they seemed to be mere shadows of the past. The sheer happiness that Jerry had experienced then had now been replaced by sadness so deep that it was almost crippling. And the sense of peace that Jerry had felt for the first time in his life had now become supplanted with constant inner turmoil. It was as if the joy of the past had occurred a lifetime ago. Jax felt his own heart ache at the sight of Jerry's suffering. He would have done anything for Jerry but Jax had been as powerless as everyone else to prevent the torment. Jerry had been his mentor and his protector from day one and now Jax was ready to take his turn in that role. Jerry was drowning and it was time to throw him a lifeline. Jax just had to figure out how to find one, a chore in and of itself, when he did not even know where to start to look.
Across the cabin, Jerry covered his eyes with his hands as if to try to erase the images from his head. "Don't do this again."
Jerry groaned softly as the thoughts of Julia entered his head once again. She had plagued his thoughts over the past ten days even though he had been four thousand miles away from her. Visions of Julia had interrupted his sleep to the point that Jerry had not even bothered to go to bed the evening before last. He had worked with the night crew instead on a problem with the newest gusher and even those efforts did not stop the thoughts of Julia. The lacerations on his right palm and forearm demonstrated the price he had paid for those visions when his attention had strayed for a moment from the pump mechanism. Jerry had cursed the pump and cursed the darkness and cursed his own mind for the thoughts that plagued it but mostly he had damned his own heart for refusing to give up the hold that Julia still had on it.
The sound of the ringing cell phone interrupted Jerry from his plague of images. It took a moment to register that it was Jax's phone from across the aisle. Jax pulled the phone from the pocket of his jacket and grinned at the sound of Brenda and Jillian's voices on the other end. It was approaching 8:00pm in Port Charles and it was time for Jillian to say good night. He watched as Jax's face lit up like a Christmas tree once again and then Jerry felt his own heart flutter. "Damn," Jerry cursed to himself again. His heart was still infected with that contagion of joy.
Jillian sat next to the speaker on the phone. "Daddy, are you and Uncle Jerry way up in the sky now?"
"Yes, princess, way up in the sky." He shifted in his seat. "I'll be home very late but I will come in to kiss you good night and then I'll see you in the morning."
"Nite-nite Daddy." Jillian smiled as she spoke into the speaker of the phone in the den. "Kiss Lady too and Roo-Roo."
"Okay, I will be sure to do that," Jax responded with a chuckle. "And you be sure that Mommy goes to bed when you do and does not try to wait up for me."
Brenda rolled her eyes at Jax's comment. "I will see you when you get here, Jax. Be careful."
Jerry's upper lip involuntarily turned up into a smile at Brenda's obvious disregard of Jax's comment. She was still as stubborn as ever.
Jillian then piped in. "I have to say nite-nite to Uncle Jerry too."
"Of course." Jax turned toward the center aisle. "He is right here."
Jerry took the phone from Jax. "Roo, are you calling to say good morning to me?"
Jillian giggled. "No, it's nighttime. Look outside, it's dark."
"No, it's sunny here," Jerry teased. "Your mother pulled the shades down so you would think it was night and go to sleep. She's going to have a party now."
"No, night." Jillian shook her head. "I had my cookie for dessert so it's night. You're teasing."
Jerry snickered, she was getting much too smart already. "Okay then what are you waiting for, tell me good night."
The sound of a loud sigh came across the phone line. "Nite-nite Uncle Jerry. Tomorrow you have to come see my ballerina picture."
"I'll see your ballerina picture." Jerry smiled into the phone. "Good night Roo."
Jax took the phone from Jerry and said good night. "Good night Jillian and good night Brenda. Sweet dreams both of you." He turned the power off and slid the phone back into his jacket pocket.
Jerry took a sharp intake of air and then turned to Jax. "Jasper, do you have any idea how lucky you are?"
'Yes." Jax nodded his head as his eyes met Jerry's gaze. "And I hold on tighter every day because of what I know."
"Don't ever allow anything to change that." Jerry's words were murmured in an almost inaudible whisper.
He looked directly at Jerry whose words had suddenly provided an opening on which Jax could pounce. "As in do whatever I need to do? Move whatever has to be moved? Stop whatever must be stopped? And never stop trying until you have no breath left to try?"
Jerry wet his dry lips at the sound of his own advice on life's victory being thrown back in his face. "Yes."
"Fine," Jax said with the motion of his hand. "But what goes for me, goes for you."
He felt his defenses go up at the implication of Jax's words. "Jasper, you are forgetting who the elder is here?"
"Like hell," Jax replied with a roll of his eyes. "You've stepped out of the game. Get back in before you regret it for the rest of your life." He took a deep breath and his tone softened. "You won't be alone. Ever. Jerry, we're all right here, and I mean all of us."
Jerry swallowed the lump in his throat. "Is there still a game?"
"There's still a game," Jax answered as he reached across the aisle and patted Jerry on the shoulder. "You just have to be willing to grasp it."
Jerry leaned against his elbow as the night sky caught his attention once again. Jax watched his shoulders relax a bit as Jerry seemed to be in deep reflection. A small sign escaped from Jax's lips as he sat there. He could only hope that maybe there had been a lifeline found to which Jerry could grasp.
The Jacks Residence -- 11:45pm
Only the tiffany lamp in the foyer illuminated the lower level of the house as Jax stepped inside. Lady bounded down the steps and Jax patted the dog's head and then followed her up the stairs. Jax quietly entered Jillian's room as Lady returned to her nightly sleeping spot at the foot of the bed. Jax smiled as he watched Jillian peacefully sleeping with Roo-Roo cradled in her arms. He gently kissed her on the cheek and then arranged Jillian's blanket. Before he tiptoed out of the bedroom, Jax patted Lady and Roo-Roo's heads good night just as he had promised Jillian earlier on the phone.
As he saw the lights of the master suite shining out into the hallway, Jax rolled his eyes. When Jax neared the room, he could hear the soft music of the stereo playing as well. Jax knew exactly how he would find Brenda when he entered the bedroom area of the suite. A huge grin covered his face when he walked in and saw Brenda on the bed just as he had imagined. She was sound asleep, wearing a pair of satin pajama bottoms and the biggest denim shirt Jax owned. Amidst a pile of pillows, there was Brenda laying across the bed on top of the blankets with the newest romantic adventure by Tyra Song sitting on her lap. It was the customary position these days in which Jax would find Brenda when she tried to wait up for him to return home.
Jax put down his suitcase and turned off some of the lights in the room. He smiled as he saw the huge bouquet of white roses sitting atop the nightstand next to Brenda's side of the bed. Jax had sent them to her three days earlier when he had left for California. He slid his navy blue blazer off his shoulders and tossed it, as well as his tie, onto the chair. Jax kicked off his shoes as he unbuttoned his white shirt thereby exposing his strong chest muscles and washboard stomach. Jax then quietly approached the bed and when he did, Brenda's eyes fluttered opened. A radiant smile lit up her face as she sat up.
Brenda murmured as she held her arms out to him. "Honey, you're home."
Jax sighed deeply as he sat down on her side of the bed. "You have to be stubborn, don't you? You should be under the blankets asleep for the night, not trying to wait up for me."
Brenda pulled Jax into her arms as she tightly hugged him. "I was just taking a little rest, I'm fine." She smiled as she breathed in the scent of his cologne. "You feel and smell so good."
"You too, my love," Jax whispered as he kissed the top of her head and drank in the fragrance of her honeysuckle shampoo.
She traced her finger along the soft skin of Jax's jawline. "You look tired."
Jax's mouth curved up into a smile as his hand cradled the back of Brenda's head. "It's been a hectic three days." His right eyebrow arched as Jax continued. "And I couldn't stop thinking about you. The suite at Highlands Inn is just not the same when you are traveling alone."
Soft laughter fell from Brenda's lips. "Tell me about it." She then exhaled sharply. "That was an unforgettable night."
"In more ways than one," Jax whispered as he placed his hand on Brenda's abdomen and then leaned down to place two baby kisses on it. "Something tells me that these two will be great fans of the Pacific Ocean."
She looked over Jax's shoulder at the bouquet of white roses on the nightstand. "And snow white roses." Brenda stroked his cheek as she smiled. "These roses are just as beautiful as the ones you brought to me that night in Carmel."
Jax reached over and pulled out a single rose from the arrangement. He brushed the velvety petals of the flower against the fullness of Brenda's cheek. "But they pale in comparison to you."
"You're so sweet," Brenda responded as she took the rose in one hand and ran her other hand up and down the skin of Jax's chest which was exposed by his unbuttoned shirt. "But honey, I think you need to get your eyes checked."
"My eyesight is fine," Jax retorted as he kissed the top of her head. "You're beautiful and much sexier than any rose could ever be."
An extended sigh fell from Brenda's lips. "I think I know how Midnight felt carrying Star around for all those months."
Jax chuckled as he wrapped his arms around her. "Midnight only had one foal, you're carrying two angels."
"If I get much bigger, I'm going to wonder if they're three." Brenda fingered the unfastened button at the bottom of the shirt she was wearing. "I can only close half the buttons now and this is the biggest shirt you have."
Jax flashed her a lopsided grin. "You look wonderful and you are truly radiant."
His eyes roamed down her body and then stopped at the tempting cavern on her chest. The first two buttons of the shirt were open and the crests of Brenda's breasts peaked out above the denim material. Her breasts seemed even bigger than they had been three days before when Jax had left for California. Jax still could not believe the size and fullness of them. Her breasts had changed more than in any other pregnancy as they were already the size they had been when Brenda was nursing Jillian.
The denim material seemed to softly mold around the weight of Brenda's breasts. The glimpse provided by the open neckline of the shirt showed the creamy porcelain skin and the roundness of Brenda's breasts. If he closed his eyes, Jax would have been able to feel the weight of each breast in the palm of his hand and to see the darkened skin around their centers. Even his large hands now could not completely cover the fullness of her breasts.
Brenda shook her head slightly as she recognized Jax's gaze. "Before you start drooling, just remember these breasts will never be the same. After this is all over, my cleavage will be at my bellybutton."
A snicker echoed in the room as Jax kissed the corners of Brenda's mouth. "Then your bellybutton had better get used to having lots of attention from me."
"That's assuming these cantaloupes don't turn into honeydew melons by then and you can still find my bellybutton." Brenda exhaled sharply as she shook her head. "At this rate, I'm not even sure I will be able to stand up straight three months from now when the dairy opens."
Jax flashed Brenda a devilish grin. "Well, you certainly know how much I love honeydew melons and The Hunchback of Notre Dame is a very revered character."
Brenda fingered the petals of the white rose she held as her face displayed a mock glare. "Watch it."
"Believe me, I am." Jax's eyes twinkled as he gaped at the cavern between her milky white breasts. "I'm watching both of those extraordinary assets of yours."
Brenda innocently brought the rose to her nose and inhaled the sweet scent. Without a second glance, she then suddenly brushed the petals of the flower against Jax's chest. "Are you watching now?" Before Jax could grab her hand, the petals dipped under his arm where Brenda knew he was the most vulnerable to a tickle attack.
Jax was caught off guard and Brenda managed to push him down onto the blankets. His head was just inches from the bottom edge of the mattress as they were sprawled out on the bed, laying from bottom to top. Brenda pushed off the shirt from Jax's chest and continued to tickle Jax under the arms with the rose and her nimble fingers. Between their thrashing and Jax's attempts to get away from Brenda's torment, the comforter slid to the floor.
Her enchanting laughter sounded like angelic music to Jax's ears. He had missed her so much over the past three days. Brenda then sent his heart racing even more as she leaned over and tickled his earlobe with her throaty whisper. "Maybe next time, you will do as you are told."
"Maybe not," he responded in a husky voice as he finally managed to grab hold of one of Brenda's torturing hands. "I would have to give up all the punishment then."
Brenda's protruding stomach rested against Jax's abdomen as she leaned over him. "Are you saying that you won't promise to behave?"
"Of course not. I'm promising not to behave." His mouth curved up into a sexy smile. "You know how much you enjoy it when I'm bad."
Brenda picked up the white rose that laid against the edge of the mahogany poster bed. "It seems to me that I heard that almost seven months ago on a certain night in Carmel." She trailed the rose gently down Jax's forehead and over his cheeks. Her voice was as soft as the satiny rose petals stroking against his skin. "Do you remember?"
"I remember," he murmured lowly. Visions of the night in Carmel once again came to Jax's mind. He had spent the past two evenings recalling every moment in his dreams and the images had been so real that Jax had been able to smell the perfumed scent of the delicate roses in his visions. "My God, I remember it all."
Brenda sensed Jax's body tightens beneath her and she felt the intensity of his desire brushing against her thigh as she laid beside him. His eyes closed as Brenda's fingers stroked his face. It was exactly as it had been that night in Carmel. Brenda gazed at Jax and memories of Carmel filtered through her head. They had been at the bottom of the canopy bed at the Highlands Inn that evening as well. When Jax had surprised her with his late night visit, they had fallen into bed and made love with reckless abandon. It had been over three weeks since they had even seen each other and their passion meters were in overdrive. Clothes had been torn off as if they were the attire for paper dolls. The blanket and comforter from the bed had been scattered along with the clothes as Jax and Brenda had devoured one another. When they had both collapsed after their blazing and wild encounter, they had found themselves at the opposite end of the bed.
After their satiated bodies had enjoyed the recuperative slumber, Brenda had awakened to find Jax still in a blissful sleep. She had crawled out of the crimson satin sheet twisted around them and then maneuvered herself to the top of the bed. There Brenda had taken a single white rose from the vase on the nightstand. When she had returned to Jax at the bottom of the bed, she had traced a path along his forehead and down his nose to his lips with the velvet petals. Her lips followed the path of the petals as she dropped warm, wet kisses on his skin. It was still two hours before dawn and the sliding doors to the balcony had been left completely opened during the night. As Jax had awakened to Brenda's caresses and kisses, the moonlight was casting a shadow across the bed and the sound of the Pacific Ocean below was echoing inside the room. It had felt like a fantasy to both of them but it had been real.
Just like the slow, long and delicious lovemaking had been which had followed their awakening.
As her thoughts returned to the present, Brenda wet her dry lips in response to the sensual memories which had just filled her mind. She knew that the babies she now carried had been conceived during their gentle, early morning lovemaking. Amidst the feel of the soft ocean breezes and the sound of the breakers crashing against the shore, the twins had been created in a wave of love. Carmel would always possess a special place in her heart and Brenda had thought about that night often over the past three days since Jax had traveled once again to the romantic retreat.
Brenda placed the white rose beside her on the bed and dropped baby kisses down Jax's forehead to his nose and then to lips. Jax moaned softly as she whispered words of love to him. Tonight, there would be no soft ocean breezes but the November wind bellowed outside as the moonlight glistened through the skylight. Jax shuddered slightly at the sensation of her warm touch. He felt even more tightening between his legs as his passion grew. It had only been a little over three weeks since lovemaking had been added to the "list of don'ts" but he craved Brenda as if it had been months. Her caresses were sweet torture and Jax could not stop himself from threading his fingers through her silky thick locks as she kissed his chest. Her fingers played with the blonde hair on his chest as her lips and mouth relished the taste of him.
As Jax savored her passionate torment, he closed his eyes again and images of the night in Carmel came flooding back to him. Brenda's mouth had fully explored his chest that night as her tongue had left a warm trail down the center of his chest. When her tongue had plunged inside his navel, Jax had moaned in pure ecstasy. The moans quickly then became groans as Brenda's hands had sensually assaulted his body. Jax had cried out to her as his control was about to falter and Brenda had then moved fully on top of him and made their bodies one. A primal groan had escaped Jax's lips as their bodies matched the union of their hearts and souls with such a perfect fit, it seemed as though their bodies had been born to be joined together.
Jax tried to shake the images from his head and knew he had to get off this bed and into a cold shower, a shower of ice cubes as a matter of fact. As Jax opened his eyes, he whimpered at the feel of Brenda's tongue inside his navel. His body reacted to Brenda's sensual touch as it had from the first moment they had ever been intimate. The sight of her fingers unfastening his belt made him shudder again. Jax tried to find his way out of his passionate daze at the feel of his trousers being pushed down his legs but the heat between his loins engulfed his whole body. His voice was barely audible when he finally could form a coherent thought. "Brenda, don't."
"Sshh darling." Brenda's soft lips kissed his flat abdomen as her hand reached inside his black silk boxers. "Just enjoy your punishment."
"Oh God, Brenda." His heart was pounding against his chest as his heart, body and soul became her prisoner.
"I love you, honey," Brenda muttered as she continued her sweet torture. "I love you so much."
Jax's breathing was labored as he shifted against the sheet. "Brenda." Her name fell over and over from his lips as she pleasured him in the only way she could now.
As Brenda loved him, Jax cried out in delirium. It was as if the waves were crashing at the shoreline again as his love surged. Jax called out Brenda's name and murmured his love for her as swells of passion broke like whitecaps upon the ocean. It was heaven being in her arms and paradise being in her heart.
And later as Jax slept against the fullness of her breasts, Brenda tenderly kissed his forehead. She smiled at the sound of his deep breathing and the feel of his steady heartbeat. And her own heart sung at the memory of the last words Jax had whispered to her before falling into blissful sleep. "I love you, Brenda, and you make every fantasy a reality." Brenda closed her eyes in happiness at the knowledge that she would murmur the same sentiment about Jax as sleep overtook her.
Friday, November 9, 2001
J & J Jacks -- 6:00pm
Julia leaned her head against the wall of the elevator as it ascended toward the sixteenth floor of the J & J Jacks Building. She had spent the past day and a half in Manhattan with Scott dealing with some legal issues on the waterfront renovation project. She had arrived back in Port Charles in time to keep her late afternoon appointment with Melanie and Julia's hands were still trembling slightly from the session. It had been the first session in which Julia had been able to get some of her feelings out and she was still somewhat shaken by the intensity of it all.
She also knew that the fact that Jerry was back in town had a strong bearing on her emotional state this afternoon. The trip to Manhattan had taken Julia away from Port Charles when he had returned to the office yesterday and she knew that Jerry would be out of the office this evening for a meeting he was handling for Jax. Julia would not see him until Monday and the weekend would give her the time she needed to prepare herself. The ten day period in which he had been gone from Port Charles had seemed much longer to Julia. Since she had begun her counseling sessions with Melanie, she had been flooded with a gamut of emotions. At times, Julia thought she was stronger, while at others, she felt more unsteady than ever. Melanie had assured Julia that the feelings she was having were completely normal. She was going to have to learn to crawl again before she could learn to walk.
Julia rubbed her hands together as a shiver traveled through her body. She was not sure if the tremble was the result of her swirling emotions from the session or the chilly climate of the day. The weather had been gray and frosty all day and tonight a brisk wind was blowing off the Port Charles River. It was a typical November evening, signaling the approach of the cold, snowy winter for the city. The cold and bleak weather of the season had never been a favorite of hers and Julia could only hope that this winter, she could find some warmth and brightness.
She stepped off the elevator and entered the main lobby of J & J Jacks. The office was quiet although she could see the lights on in Scott's office suite. She knew Scott was finishing the changes to the contracts they had negotiated this morning in Manhattan. Julia walked toward her office to pick up the Fidelity Savings & Loan file to review over the weekend in preparation for her meeting on Monday morning. She dropped the Port of New York shipping file on her desk and then retrieved the Fidelity file from the credenza. Julia then remembered that the annual report on the institution had been shelved in the conference room. She shut off the lights to her suite and walked toward the conference room to get the report before heading to the loft.
When Julia turned the corner toward the conference room area, a waft of the lingering smell of cologne met her. She recognized it immediately as Jerry's cologne. The scent had dissipated from the office in the ten days that Jerry had been gone but he was back, so it was back. Julia paused in the center of the corridor and took another deep inhale of the clean scent. She was just beginning to realize just how much she missed even the trivial things about Jerry and her life with him. Tonight would be no better as she would be alone at the loft during the cold and blustery night unlike during the past several seasons when she and Jerry would snuggle up together to keep warm.
With a deep sigh, Julia moved toward the conference room and pushed open the partially closed door. It was only then that she discovered that Jerry was sitting in a chair at the end of the table. "Jerry." She stammered a bit. "I didn't realize you were here."
"Julia," he murmured in a surprised tone. Jerry had not looked up from the oil field output charts until he had heard the sound of Julia's voice. Julia's presence was as much of a surprise to Jerry as his was to her as he had overheard Scott say that Julia had gone straight to another appointment upon their return from Manhattan this afternoon. He cleared his throat. "I didn't expect to see you either."
Julia felt her legs wobble slightly. <<"You are not going to collapse like a rag doll.">> She took a cleansing breath. "Did your site inspections go well?"
"Overall yes," he responded with a slight bob of his head. His eyes met hers for a moment and then Jerry quickly lowered his gaze. <<"Why do those eyes of yours have to be so damn blue?">>
"Good." A ragged sigh fell from her lips.
Jerry swiveled his chair slightly. "Scott gave me the update on the port contracts."
She tightened her grip around the Fidelity file to keep her hands from trembling. "I think every interest has been taken care of without any real strain on the profit margin."
He leaned against his elbow. "What more could we ever ask for than that?"
<<"A lot more.">> Julia felt her mouth suddenly go dry. "Everyone seemed pleased."
<<"Of course, Scott said you were as mesmerizing as ever.">> Jerry rustled the output projection sheets. "Jax certainly was. He finished up with the City Council earlier than expected this afternoon so Scott was able to fill him in before Jax had to leave for the Carnegie meeting."
There was then a period of prolonged silence before Julia found her voice again. "I just came in to get the Fidelity Annual Report before I leave." She crossed the room to reach the book shelf. "I'll let you get back to what you were doing."
<<"Please, not that. Can't I ever get a break from these visions of you in my head?">> His eyes involuntarily followed Julia's movement across the room. <<"Bloody hell, now I will be envisioning those long, gorgeous legs too.">> In his agitated state, Jerry forgot the twelve stitches in his right palm from his war with the oil pump and he tightly grasped the edge of the conference table with both hands. "Damn it," he blurted out without thinking.
Julia snapped her head around at the sound of his voice. "Jerry?" It was only then that she saw the bandage around his right hand. "My God, what happened to you?"
"Don't worry about it." Jerry gritted his teeth as he waited for the stinging pain to subside. "It's nothing."
"That sure didn't sound like nothing to me," she retorted as she dropped the file and annual report on the conference table and grabbed his right arm.
Jerry cursed aloud again as her hand made contact with the stitched lacerations on his wrist. "Damn."
Julia gasped as she saw just how far up the bandage was wrapped on his arm. "I'm so sorry." She caught her breath. "Are you all right?"
"Hell, yes," he replied with a grimace. "It's just stitches, Julia, not a mortal wound."
She shook her head at Jerry's blasé attitude. "What happened?" Julia then answered her own question. "You were supposed to be overseeing the inspection teams not battling those oil pumps. You have teams of workers for that."
"You just don't get it," Jerry muttered with a roll of his eyes. <<"Good grief, she was as infuriating as ever.">>
"Oh, I get it," she responded with a long sigh. <
Jerry pulled his hand away from her, grimacing again at the pain that motion caused. "My hand and wrist will be just fine."
"Would you stop being a jackass for one minute?" She reached out and gingerly took his hand again. "You could have torn something open."
Jerry gritted his teeth again as she carefully checked the bandage. However, this time his clench was an effort to ignore the electricity that the touch of her finger tips was causing in him. <<"Why do those fingers have to be so soft?">> He could not take the sensation of her touch any longer so Jerry lifted his hand. "It's fine, Julia. Really."
A deep sigh escaped from Julia's lips as he looked up at her. A lock of hair had fallen onto Jerry's forehead and Julia clenched her fist to stop from reaching up and brushing it from Jerry's face. <<"It would be so easy but you can't.">> She took a step back from him. "Did you get a tetanus shot? It's been...."
Jerry's voice interrupted her. "Yes, so everything is all right." He felt a lump form in his throat at her reference to the past. <<"And yes, damn it, I was thinking of you the whole time and that damned hinge on your book case.">>
She felt her legs slightly wobble again. <<"Why did you have to bring up that? No, don't even think about how you had to drag the infuriating fool to GH and insist that he get a tetanus shot and stitches.">> Julia exhaled sharply and then murmured to him. "Are you sure you're all right?"
Jerry nodded his head. "I'm sure." Her voice had sounded so comforting to him that it had surprised him. His eyes were immediately drawn to hers.
Julia held his gaze for a moment before she spoke. "I'm glad you're all right, Jerry." She could feel her heart fluttering in her chest. "I had better head out now."
"That's a good idea." He felt his shoulders relax a bit as he looked up at her again. "Good night Julia." Jerry paused for a moment but then the words came. "And thanks."
"You're welcome." Much to her own amazement, Julia even managed a small smile. She picked up the file and annual report from the conference table. "Good night Jerry."
Jerry watched her walk out of the conference room and then disappear around the corner. He leaned his head against the back of the chair and let out a ragged breath. <<"Damn, another weekend of visions and no sleep.">> Meanwhile, Julia rested her head against the lobby wall as she waited for the elevator. A soft sigh fell from Julia's lips as she closed her eyes and a shiver ran through her again. <<"Oh, how I've missed that insufferable man.">> As a loud gust of wind howled through the windows, both Jerry and Julia knew it was going to be an unbearably cold night.
The Jacks Residence -- 7:15pm
Brenda dried Jillian's hair after a bath and then helped Jillian get dressed in her Minnie Mouse pajamas. Jillian picked up the hairbrush from the dressing table and she and Brenda went downstairs to the den. Lady followed them into the den as Brenda sat down on the sofa. Brenda rested one hand against her stomach as the twins were in their customary evening play mode and her other hand gripped the brush as Jillian stood in front of the couch so that Brenda could fix her hair.
Jillian turned her head as the wind howled through the windows. "The wind's making noise."
"Yes, and it's cold tonight," Brenda said as she ran the brush through Jillian's curls.
With a smile, Jillian held out her covered foot. "Uh-huh so I have feet in my pajamas."
Brenda nodded her head. "Tonight is a good night for your warm pajamas." She turned Jillian sideways to reach the side of her hair. "And it's perfect for a fire in the fireplace."
"Daddy's gonna make a fire when he comes home." Jillian turned her head to look at Brenda. "Daddy said no picking up wood for Mommy so we have to wait."
She laughed softly. "You and Daddy talked about wood on the phone."
"I'm being Daddy's helper," Jillian responded with a bob of her head. "I'm taking care of you."
A bright smile covered Brenda's face. "Yes, you are, sweetie." She hugged Jillian. "And Mommy loves both you and Daddy so much."
Lady barked and then got up from the rug. Jillian giggled as she turned to Brenda. "Daddy's car is here."
"Okay, one second." She quickly ran the brush through Jillian's hair once more. "Now you're ready."
Jillian scampered behind Lady out of the den and stood in the foyer and waited for Jax. The door opened a moment later bringing a gust of wind with it as Jax entered the house. "Oh, Daddy! It's cold."
Jax closed the door behind him. "Yes, it is princess." He bent reached down and lifted Jillian into his arms. "Don't you look pretty in your pink pajamas."
"The pajamas have feet too," she replied with a little laugh. "Mommy says they are warm."
"Yes, they're warm." Jax nuzzled his nose against Jillian's check. "Now you can get me warm."
Jillian spoke through her giggles. "Your nose is cold."
"Sshh." Jax whispered as he brought his finger to his lips. "Let's get Mommy with our cold noses and hands."
Jillian covered her mouth to stop her laughter as she and Jax moved up the hall toward the den. As they entered the room Brenda folded her arms in front of her and flashed both of them a Cheshire grin. "Don't either of you little sneaks come over here and touch me with any cold noses, hands or anything else."
Jax chuckled as Jillian giggled. She touched Jax's face with her hand. "Mommy's smart."
Brenda smiled as she rolled her eyes. "You two cohorts are so transparent."
"I guess we are." Jax's mouth curved up as he moved toward the couch. "But my dear, your reward is the same regardless." He then swooped Jillian down and they both rubbed their noses against the cheeks of a laughing Brenda as they all fell against the back of the couch.
"We got you, Mommy," Jillian squealed.
Jax pulled Brenda into his arms. "That we do." He dropped tender kisses behind Brenda's ear. "But I bet you still love us."
Brenda let out an exaggerated breath. "We'll see." She then turned to Jax. "You can begin to get back in my good graces by starting a fire."
"Mommy waited for the fire." Jillian beamed proudly as she looked up at Jax. "I helped Mommy remember not to pick up any wood."
"Thank you princess," Jax murmured as he stroked Jillian's cheek. "You are such a good helper."
A smile formed on Jillian's lips. "Mommy can't pick up things now like me and wood."
"That's right, princess, but it won't be like that always. After Thanksgiving and Christmas and some snow, the babies will be ready to be born."
Jillian nodded. "Then Mommy and Dream can ride with me and Silhouette."
"Yes, we can." Brenda winked at Jillian. "You are getting so big now. Silhouette is going to be so surprised when she sees you. Jillian, you are a little lady now."
As Jillian gleamed, Jax put his arms around both Brenda and Jillian. "I am so lucky to have two such beautiful and wonderful ladies here with me."
A half hour later, Jax had changed clothes and had finished building a fire in the fireplace in the den. He moved the coffee table out of the way and then Jillian helped Jax spread out a comforter in front of the fire. Corrine came into the den with a tray of beverages and then Brenda handed Jillian the pillows that Jax had brought from upstairs.
As Jillian arranged the pillows on the comforter, Brenda sighed softly. "I am beginning to have serious doubts about this idea."
"Don't worry, I'll get you up." A smirk crossed Jax's face as he teased her. "There must be something in the garage to help me out." Jax then chuckled as he swatted Brenda across the butt.
"You're so hysterical." She murmured under her breath as a sly smile appeared on her face. "That long, lonely winter could easily be extended well into spring with more comments like that, mister." Brenda then swatted Jax on the butt as she moved away from him.
Jillian grabbed Roo-Roo and her Disney storybook and plopped down into the middle of the comforter. "All ready."
Jax sat down on the floor as Brenda sat on the couch. He held his hand out to her as she slowly slid from the couch to the floor. Jax propped her pillows behind Brenda's back as she leaned against the bottom of the couch.
As Jillian scooted between Jax and Brenda, Jax took the afghan off the sofa and covered their legs with the blanket. "There you go, princess, all nice and warm for you."
Brenda took Jillian's cup from the tray. "Sweetie, here is your hot chocolate and then you can have your gingerbread cookie."
"Yummy," Jillian immediately replied as she took a sip. "Lots of baby marshmallows."
"I know how much like baby marshmallows.." Brenda picked up her mug and knew that orange blossom tea was never going to hold a candle to hot chocolate with little marshmallows but herbal tea was a staple these days for her in lieu of the sweet concoction.
Jax smiled to himself at the hungry little girl look that suddenly flashed across Brenda's face and then instantly disappeared again. It was a familiar look to Jax as he had noticed it almost from the first moment he had met Brenda. That look had been partially responsible for capturing Jax's heart five and half years earlier and it still could make his heart skip a beat even now.
Jillian handed her cup back to Brenda and took a gingerbread cookie. She then gave Jax the storybook and Jax opened it up to begin reading. Brenda tried to adjust a pillow against her stomach so that Jillian could lay her head there. These days that was no easy feat as any semblance of Brenda's lap had disappeared weeks ago.
Jillian finished her cookie and moved closer to Brenda. With a sigh she exclaimed, "Only the babies get to sit on your lap now, Mommy. All the time and there's no room for me."
Brenda exchanged a look with Jax as she caressed Jillian's shoulder. "Yes, Jillian, that is what happens when babies are growing. When they get bigger, there is not a lot of room left for anyone else, even big sisters and brothers."
Jillian exhaled dramatically. "No room even for Roo-Roo and he's little."
"Let's see what we can do about this. First we have Roo-Roo." Brenda took the stuffed kangaroo in her hand and leaned him against the crook of her other elbow. "There is Roo-Roo's spot."
Jax placed the book in his lap. "I bet we can still find a way for you to be on Mommy's lap with the babies." He helped Brenda slide down a bit so that Jillian could lay sideways and rest her head on a pillow leaning against Brenda's stomach. Jillian's legs were on Jax's lap and the storybook would sit on her legs as Jax read it.
She tickled the skin under Jillian's chin. "How is that, sweetie? Now you and the twins are all in Mommy's lap."
"Good," Jillian responded as she grinned at Brenda and then at Jax.
Brenda nodded. "Daddy did a good job and you are teaching the babies how to share already." She smiled radiantly at Jillian. "Jillian, thank you so much for being such a wonderful big sister."
Jax bobbed his head in agreement. "The twins are going to have a very special big sister." He fingered a loose tendril of hair on Jillian's forehead. "They are so lucky to have you to teach them things."
"Just think of all the things you know that you can help the babies learn." Brenda held Jillian's hand with one hand and Jax's hand in the other. "The twins don't know about Halloween or what school is or what a dog looks like or how to sit on a swing."
"I'll tell the babies." Jillian spoke quickly and enthusiastically. "Lady's a dog and she barks and in school we draw letters and numbers and you have to hold on real tight on the swings." She caught her breath for a second. "And at Halloween, there's lots of candy." Jillian giggled softly. "I can show 'em my ballerina dress too."
Jax flashed Brenda a lopsided grin before looking down at Jillian. "I knew you were going to be a wonderful big sister."
Jillian bit her bottom lip just like Brenda did when she was excited about something. She looked down at the storybook and a small gasp fell from her lips. "The babies don't know any stories."
Brenda shook her head. "Not even one story."
Jillian's mouth opened wide in astonishment. "Oh boy, I have to teach the babies about Mickey and Minnie and Cinderella and Winnie-the-Pooh and Peter Pan and Aladdin and everybody." Her eyes widened. "Big sisters have lots of work."
Brenda laughed under her breath as she tightly held onto Jillian. "Very hard but you are going to be a great one."
Jillian lifted her head and spoke to Brenda's stomach. "It's the Cinderella story now and there's a pumpkin and glass slipper and horses and a pretty girl. Listen to Daddy read it."
Jax started reading and Brenda caressed Jillian's hand as it sat under the pillow on Brenda's stomach. After the first two pages of the story were completed, Jillian's head popped up from the pillow. Jax looked down at Jillian and then saw Brenda biting her own lower lip in excitement.
Brenda sighed happily before speaking. "Did you feel that, sweetie?"
"Uh-huh." A beaming smile covered Jillian's face. "The pillow and my hand moved. It was a bump."
"That was the babies saying hello." Brenda felt Jax's hand squeeze hers tighter. "They're trying to wave to you already."
A small squeal escaped Jillian's lips. "Daddy, the babies are waving at me."
"Of course they are, the babies know that you're their big sister." Jax sat the book in his lap again and then covered part of Jillian's hand with his as Brenda's hand covered the rest.
Brenda moved Jillian's hand higher as an even stronger set of kicks was then delivered. Jillian giggled as she felt the contact to Brenda's abdomen. "They're waving again Mommy and Daddy." Jillian then moved her head so that her lips were only an inch from Brenda's stomach. "Hi babies, it's Jillian, your big sister and I'm gonna teach you lots of things."
As the wind howled outside and the firelight cast dancing shadows across the walls, Brenda and Jax reveled in the radiance of hope and love and family. Joy could warm up a room faster than anything and it suddenly felt as though an inferno raged around them all.