Saturday, May 4, 2002
The Barrett/Jacks Penthouse -- 8:45am

Julia tucked her hands under the pillow as she watched the steady rise and fall of Jerry's chest. He was still sleeping soundly and it felt so good to have him home again. Even though Jerry had only been in San Francisco for three days, Julia had missed him as if he had been gone for three weeks. Her mouth curved up into a smile at the recollection of Jerry's surprise early return during the wee hours of the night. Julia had thought she had been dreaming when she felt Jerry's arms move around her a few hours before dawn. It had only been when she had heard Jerry whisper, "I love you kiddo," that Julia had realized that it had not been a dream.

"None of this is a dream," Julia thought to herself as she propped herself up against the pillows. It had been three weeks since she had come back to the penthouse and they had started putting their marriage back together. Julia was still pinching herself at times to ensure that it was all real. They were seeing Melanie and during those sessions, it was almost too real as there were still issues to resolve and the past to rectify but at other times, it was if they were newlyweds again. Julia could not help but to smile again at the thought of Jerry's early flight home, he had missed her as much as she had missed him.

Julia looked over at the bedside clock and saw that it was approaching nine o'clock. As she expected Jerry to sleep another hour or so, Julia knew that she would have enough time to get showered and dressed and then be able to start breakfast before he awoke. Knowing Jerry, he would be starving and this way she would have time to have everything ready to cook his favorite vegetable and cheese omelet while she grilled the steak and potatoes to be served along with the eggs. She still had no idea how he managed to eat as much food as he did in the morning but breakfast had been Jerry's favorite meal of the day since she had first met him. As Rose had cooked for them during the week since the days before they had even married, Julia had always enjoyed being able to indulge Jerry on the weekends. She had not expected Jerry back for breakfast this morning but fortunately, Julia had asked Rose to pick up some things at the Farmer's Market yesterday morning so she had exactly what she needed.

She looked down at Jerry again and sighed contently at his deep slumber. Julia then blew him a kiss before silently slipping out of their bed. She made sure that the drapes were still tightly drawn before turning off the ringer for the phone on the nightstand. With one more glance back at the bed, Julia quietly headed into the bathroom for her shower. Once inside the jade and cream- colored bathroom, Julia eyed the marbled sunken tub but quickly put that notion out of her mind in the interest of time.

There would be time for a lounging bubble bath tonight when she would have some company and some assistance to wash her back. As she turned on the water, a breathless sigh escaped from Julia's lips at the thought of just how adept that assistance would be. A cold shower was definitely not what she had in mind this morning so Julia shook her head to drag herself from that reverie and then quickly pulled the navy satin negligee over her head. She stepped out of the gown's matching panties and then opened the door and climbed into the shower.

As the glass walls of the large stall became fogged with steam, Julia dipped her head under the pulsating rivulet of the shower. She ran her hands through her thick tresses as the hot water continued to massage her shoulders. It was invigorating and relaxing all at the same time and Julia stepped fully under the stream of warmth to allow the beads of water to pound against her neck. She was distracted by the sensation of the coursing gush and the soft moans falling from her lips drowned out the sound of the glass door opening and then closing behind her.

Julia dipped her head back as she caught her breath and then finally spoke. "You shouldn't be here, my husband will be awake soon."

Jerry's hands continued to stroke and squeeze the back of her hips and thighs as he whispered to her. "I was never one to let an opportunity go to waste when it comes to finding a beautiful and sexy woman all alone in the shower. He snoozes so he loses."

"I have to get dressed and then get into the kitchen," she announced with a smirk. "I am making my husband his favorite steak and omelet meal and you know what they say about pleasing a man via his stomach."

"That was probably declared by one of Henry VIII's wives before she found her head separated from her neck. That or the wife of some other glutton with a half of a pheasant in his mouth," Jerry remarked as he spoke into her ear. "Men are really just sex-craved dogs."

Julia cleared her throat as her mouth curved into a smile. "So, then you are telling me not to make omelets and steak for my husband today?"

"No, I never said that," Jerry quickly responded. "He still does have to eat but you can let him anticipate the meal."

She wet her lips even though the shower was providing more than an ample supply of water to moisten fifty pairs of lips. "And until then, I am supposed to stay here with you and find out the benefits of mutual showers?"

"Well, from the sound of it, that husband of yours must not be a fan of appetizers if he is giving up this chance with you." He pushed his body against hers and the intensity of his arousal was evident against the back of her thigh. "On the other hand, I am a connoisseur of them and more than ready to show you just how satisfying a shared shower can be."

Julia heard her breath catch again at the feel of just how ready he was. When she attempted to turn around to face him, Jerry stopped her. "Now, you know that's against the rules. If you want to know how satisfying this can be, we have to play the game my way."

"Oh yes, the shower game..." Her voice was raspy as she continued. "Satisfying? How?"

"In several ways," Jerry responded as he nipped at her neck. "You would be amazed at just how many different ways a shower can quench thirsts and hungers."

Julia stammered slightly over her words. "Oh really?"

"Yes, and then there are other things," he murmured as his tongue then traced the tip of her earlobe and Julia let out a moan at the pleasure of it. "For example, in a shower, you can best determine just how many octaves a moan can reach."

"Octaves?" Julia was having a hard time concentrating at all as his manhood again pressed against her. "I didn't know that."

Jerry moved his hands to her waist and took a step back with her so that the water was cascading directly onto her chest. "Then we have the added stimulation of the warm water. Between that and certain touches, the peaks of certain curvaceous mountains are ready and waiting to be climbed." Jerry's hands held the weight of her soft mountains as his thumbs encircled her responsive peaks. The rosy points, stiff from the sensation of the pulsing droplets, became completely rigid at the feel of his touch.

A loud, high-pitched moan echoed from the glass walls as Julia pushed her body deeper into the grip of his hands. "Yeeesss."

His hands gently squeezed the fullness of her chest. "Now you understand what I told you about those octaves."

Julia fought to control her breathing. There was something completely electrifying about not being able to see him and her knees were already threatening to buckle. That was the last thing she wanted so Julia forced herself to focus. "Okay, time for some of my own rules," she decided. At that, Julia tipped her head further back and pushed her body against his, lifting her hips up and down against the length of him.

"My game, my rules," Jerry retorted with a deep groan. He had forgotten just how demanding this game was on his own control. There was something so inflaming about being able to explore her curves by touch only. And he missed the feel of her lips, but he loved to drive her to the threshold of madness. His right hand then slid down her stomach and stopped as his fingers nestled amidst her feminine heat.

Julia whimpered and then moaned in an elevated tone as his thumb found the spot that craved its touch.

"There's that new octave level again," Jerry murmured as his finger continued to press against her in a circular motion. "Now are you beginning to understand about just how satisfying a shower can be?"

"Please," she replied in a throaty whisper. "I want you…Please." For emphasis, she again bucked her hips before reaching her hands behind her to sensually torture him in return.

It was all he could take and Jerry quickly moved his hands to the back of her hips again and cradled Julia's curves in his palms as she beckoned him to love her. Julia then whimpered in ecstasy as he entered her from behind in one fluid motion. Jerry groaned as over and over again, their bodies sought a deeper connection. With each intensifying move, Julia gripped the shower’s towel bar for support more tightly. The fact that she could not touch him was maddening and exhilarating all at the same time. Unintelligible mumblings fell from her lips as Jerry took her closer to heaven.

When Julia finally thought she would stop breathing from the ecstasy he was giving her, Jerry made their union so complete that she thought he would reach her soul. Julia felt her body trembling as his love surrounded her and then sensed Jerry's gripping of her hips for additional support. Even amidst the sound of the pulsating water and Jerry's heavy breathing, the scream of his name was heard as Julia felt the eruptions and shocks within her. He whispered to her as her body responded to the love transpiring between them. He then felt the initial combustion of his own body and simultaneously with his own high-pitched moan, Jerry found his paradise as well.

His heart was still beating at a quickened pace as Jerry gently eased out of her warmth and then pulled Julia into his embrace. He supported his weight as he pressed his shoulder against the corner of the shower walls. He positioned Julia so that her back was against the wall for extra support. They stood there for a few minutes as the water continued to warm them. Finally Julia opened her eyes and looked up at him. "I think I understand the game now."

"I always knew you were a quick learner," Jerry retorted with a wink.

"Thank you," Julia said as her breathing began to return to normal. "Now you'll understand about that steak and omelet meal I promised you."

He found the energy to flash Julia one of his trademark devilish grins. "What about this meal that you promised?"

"I promised so you'll get it," she replied with a smile. "It will just be for lunch now." She batted her eyes and softly moaned. "Actually, you had better make that dinner....and a very late one. We'll have to see when we make it out of bed." She then shot him a blazing look. "The next game is mine."

A chuckle bounced off the glass walls as Jerry put his arms around Julia and then kissed her forehead. "Now, I know why I love you."

Julia hugged him and then their lips melded together. As her tongue slipped inside his mouth, the next game had begun.

The Jacks Residence -- 7:00pm

Robin and Matthew had joined the family for the evening and Josee had prepared an early dinner. The twins had essentially cooperated by remaining content in the playpen until almost the end of the meal. Dessert would be served later in the living room and Jax and Matthew took the opportunity to shoot a round of pool in the game room. Jillian became their cheering section as Brenda and Robin took the babies upstairs for a diaper change.

Jax frowned slightly as the red ball veered to the left and missed the side pocket. Jillian turned her head to face him. "Daddy, the ball didn't go in the hole."

"I see that, Jillian," he retorted with a lopsided grin.

"Now pretty lady, I'll show your father how it's done." Matthew smiled as he looked up at her radiant face. "Are you ready to watch the yellow ball go into the pocket?"

"Uh-huh," Jillian replied as she sat on a stool in front of the left corner pocket. "I'm watching."

"Here it comes," Matthew announced as the cue stick slid through his fingers.

The sound of the ball bouncing inside the pocket echoed from the mahogany paneled walls as Jillian clapped her hands together. "I watched the ball go in."

Matthew winked at her before casting a smug smile toward Jax. "Now you can watch these three disappear." With that, he lined up a shot and tapped the blue ball into the side pocket before returning the red ball to its home in the right corner pocket and then finally sinking the eight ball into the corner pocket in front of Jillian. Matthew grinned at Jillian. "How was that, Miss Jillian?"

Jillian loudly clapped her hands. "Good. I gotta tell Aunt Robin you winned."

"That's because you're my good luck charm," Matthew replied with a tip of his head. He helped Jillian from the stool and then dramatically bowed before her. "Thank you little lady."

Jax chuckled deeply as Jillian coyly tucked her chin against her right shoulder at Matthew's charming words before scurrying out of the room. "Are you sure you don't sell used cars for a living and just run that research lab strictly as a hobby?"

"Moi?" Matthew answered as he pointed toward the center of his chest in mock surprise.

"Yes, you," Jax replied with a roll of his eyes. "Besides being a pool shark of course. Nice cover."

Matthew laughed out loud. "Well, I had to find some way to pay for medical school." He then took a sip of his drink and smirked at Jax. "Of course, from one pool shark to another, it never hurt with the ladies either."

"No, it sure didn't." Jax snickered at the thought of the smile on a smitten Jillian's face. "It still seems to have that effect on the lovely ladies."

"And just which lovely ladies are we discussing, honey," Brenda asked as she and Robin carried the twins into the room.

"You and Robin of course," Jax retorted with a smile.

Matthew expanded upon that. "And Jillian and Jessica."

Brenda rolled her eyes slightly at the two of them. "Sure you were."

Soft laughter fell from Robin's lips. "Nice try but give it up."

"I have no idea what you two could be possibly be referring to," Jax remarked with a broad grin.

"Exactly," added Matthew. "How can any other women possibly exist when we have two such breathtaking beauties in our lives?"

Jax chuckled deeply at the looks on Brenda and Robin's faces. "That was even over the top for you, mate."

Brenda cleared her throat as she spoke to Robin. "Now, you can see why I let Mr. Smooth talker handle Amanda Barrington when it comes to the hospital board's grant approval for Kanga's Kradle."

Matthew tilted his head to the side as he pointed at Brenda. "This coming from the woman who actually gets that miser Potter to fork over hundreds of thousands of dollars with her smile and that sachet in her walk." He turned to face Jax. "One of these days, the man's liable to talk your wife into running off with him."

"Now that would be an idea," Jax exclaimed with a devilish glint in his eyes. "That just may be the answer I have been looking for."

Robin waved her hand toward Jax. "Not even a charmer like you can make that one believable. You two have been married way too long to pull that one over on any of us."

"You're right," Jax said with a sigh. "And soon to be the start of another year of living in the brig...I mean in bliss."

"Isn't he just SO sweet," Brenda asked as she moved toward Jax. "NOT."

Jax flashed Brenda a grin as he took Jessica from her arms. "Well, I've survived the last six years, so I guess I can deal with the next sixty."

"I can't believe it's going to be six years at the end of the month," Robin said as she shifted Jonathan to her left shoulder. "Where does the time go?"

Brenda made a face at Jessica. "Didn't we just talk about that this morning, pumpkin? Mommy can't believe that you and your brother are almost four and a half months old now and Jillian's already counting the days until she turns five."

Jax kissed Jessica's cheek as he looked down at Brenda. "Speaking of Matthew's latest charm victim, where is Jillian?"

"Helping Josee get dessert ready." Brenda then flashed Jax a cheshire grin smile as she continued. "And Jillian has been charmed by Matthew since the first time she met him at the Quartermaine Halloween party. She didn't need to be awed by his pool shooting talents although we all know she was."

"Cute, very cute," Jax muttered to Brenda.

"I know I am," Brenda murmured back to Jax as she bit back her mirth.

Matthew snickered as he finished his brandy. "So what are your plans to commemorate six years of the ball and chain days?"

"Well, it's the copper anniversary so I figured I'd give Brenda a few pennies." The blue in his eyes twinkled brightly as Jax spoke. "Shiny new ones, of course."

Brenda put her fingers over Jax's mouth. "And I am buying a cooper muzzle for this one."

Robin laughed as she tickled Jonathan's tummy. "Your mommy and daddy are crazy, do you know that?" A drooling grin covered the baby's face as Robin spoke to him and the room erupted with smiles all around. Robin looked up at Jax and Brenda. "Now that even your son realizes you're both crazy, what are your real plans to celebrate?"

"We haven't quite figured that out yet," Jax replied as Jessica snuggled her head against his neck. "But whatever it is, it will be special."

"Yes, it will be very special," Brenda said as she wrapped her arms around Jax's waist.

A radiant smile appeared on Robin's face at the sight of the joy on Jax and Brenda's faces. "That's wonderful. And it will be a very busy two months for you between the holidays and your anniversary and then of course the Nurses Ball."

Jax groaned and shook his head. "Not that again."

At the sight of the confused look on Robin's face, Brenda explained. "A mention of the Nurses Ball is taboo in this house for my husband since he is still dragging his feet about performing and Lucy is not about to give up."

"I'd wish you luck pal but it is useless with that woman if she has a bee in her bonnet about something," chortled Matthew.

Brenda failed to suppress the broad grin from forming on her lips. "Lucy has been calling the office and here every night for the past ten days. She even surprised us last night with a visit."

Matthew's hearty chuckle resonated from the walls. "There is no doubt about it, you will be on that stage just like the rest of us."

"No, I will not," Jax retorted with a sigh. "I am not interested in making a spectacle of myself in front of the entire town."

Robin choked back her laughter as she spoke. "Now Jax, it's been several years that you have avoided Lucy so you should consider yourself a winner to have held out this long."

"I've told him the same thing," added Brenda. "Now honey, it is time to just stop fighting it. We'll do something together and it will be fun."

"There is nothing about this that resembles fun by any stretch of the imagination," countered Jax. "Ashton is the performer, not me and Lucy will just have to get that through her thick skull that I am not getting on that stage."

Jillian entered the game room and beamed at the talk of Lucy and the Nurses Ball. "Aunt Lucy says lots of people sing and dance and me and Brooke can watch 'em."

Brenda nodded her head. "Yes Jillian, there will be lots of singing and dancing and Aunt Lucy did say that you and Brooke could come and watch practice, that's called a rehearsal."

"Yeah," Jillian exclaimed as she scurried over to Jax and Brenda. "Daddy, you can sing and dance too and I can watch you hearsal."

Brenda had to chew the inside of her mouth to maintain her composure after seeing the expression on Jax's face. She then shrugged her shoulders at him in innocence. Jax exhaled slowly before addressing Jillian. "Princess, Daddy is going to go to the Ball to watch Uncle Ned and Aunt Robin and Aunt Lucy sing and dance."

"Daddy, you gotta sing and dance too with Mommy," she replied with a sweet smile. "Me and Brooke will clap real loud."

Matthew poured himself another drink as he enjoyed the pure entertainment of the moment. Jax, on the other hand, was cringing. Now Lucy was pulling out the reinforcements and Brenda was rolling out the welcome mat for her. Jax grinned at Jillian as he spoke. "Daddy sings and dances at home for his favorite ladies, you and Mommy and Jessica, I don't need to do that at the Ball."

"You can sing at home and at the Ball," Jillian responded with a dazzling gaze. "You and Mommy can wear your pretty clothes."

"Yes, I'd love to see your pretty clothes, Jax," added Matthew.

Jax glared at Matthew before quickly changing the subject with Jillian. "Princess, did you help Josee with the dessert?"

"Uh-huh," Jillian said with a bob of her head. "It's all done, cheesecake and little strawberries." She then looked over at Robin and spoke in an animated fashion. "And it's not cheese, it's cake."

"Then we had better get into the living room and taste it," suggested Jax. "You go first and lead the way, princess." As Jillian scrambled toward the door, Jax mumbled to Brenda. "This isn't going to work, I am not making a fool of myself, not even for you or your adorable and tenacious clone."

"Whatever you say, sweetheart," Brenda crooned as she patted Jax's arm while at the same time shooting Robin and Matthew a look of pure determination. Robin willed herself not to smirk at the sight of the "take no prisoners" expression on Brenda's face. As they all headed out of the room, Robin wondered how long it would take for Brenda to convince Jax what he "really wanted to do" while Brenda began contemplating which musical number they would perform. Whatever it was, she knew the next several weeks were going to be quite a show.

Sunday, May 12, 2002
The Barrett/Jacks Penthouse -- 11:00am

As the mid-morning sun continued to rise in the sky, a slight breeze fluttered the freshly planted red geraniums lining the planter boxes along the terrace. It was a beautiful spring day and the perfect weather for al fresco dining. Taking full advantage of the opportunity, Jerry and Julia had shared breakfast on the terrace earlier this morning. Julia had remained outside in the sun while Jerry had gone inside to shower and change. She finished her cup of coffee as she gazed down to the path along the lake. The spring weather had beckoned many to the park already and even twenty stories above, Julia could discern their joy. So many children and parents enjoying the day and somewhere deep inside her heart, Julia could sense that familiar ache at the thought of their laughter. Today was meant for family celebrations but right now, she seemed only able to feel loneliness.

Jerry silently stood just inside the partially opened sliding door leading out to the terrace and watched her. He did not know exactly what he was looking for but he hadn't been able to stop scrutinizing every movement of hers since they had awakened this morning. She had been quiet all morning and seemed to be a million miles away at times and he hated the way that made him feel. Jerry could not help but to worry and wonder exactly where Julia's thoughts were at this moment.

She spoke without ever turning around to face him. "Wouldn't it be easier to watch me from out here?"

Jerry pushed the sliding door fully open and walked out onto the terrace. "Julia..."

"What are you waiting for?" Julia's gaze remained straight ahead looking out into the park as she continued. "Do you expect me to meltdown before your eyes. Is that it?"

"Julia, stop it," Jerry replied in a clipped tone.

She finally turned her head to face him and her tone became accusatory. "You've been doing it all morning. Watching me like I am a time bomb about to explode. Mother's Day is here again so is that what you expect?"

As soon as the words left her lips, Julia instantly regretted them. She closed her eyes and murmured to him. "I'm sorry. The last thing I want to do is to jump down your throat today."

Jerry leaned against the terrace wall and he spoke. "What is it that you want to do then?"

Julia opened her eyes and looked up at him. "Wage war against someone or something that can be the enemy in all this, neither of which I feasibly can do."

"So you are beating yourself up instead," Jerry suggested. "Not exactly productive or satisfying, is it?"

"No," Julia responded with a deep sigh. She stood up and moved beside him. "I'm sorry, today is more difficult than I thought it would be. It was if all these pent up emotions broke free as soon as the clock struck midnight."

Jerry took Julia's hand and led her to bench in the corner of the terrace where they sat. "You're angry, so let it out. I'll make the ultimate sacrifice today and you can take that anger out on me." He turned his shoulder so that his upper arm was directly in front of her. "You can even use me as your punching bag."

"Jerry," Julia murmured with a soft exhale and shake of her head.

"It's not a problem," he retorted. "You have no right hook whatsoever." That remark brought a swat of his arm by Julia and Jerry then flashed her a huge grin. "See, I told you."

"You are not funny," Julia remarked as punched him in the arm again.

Jerry smirked as he ignored the glaring look on her face. "Now what have I told you about your thumb, you have to protect it when you make a fist. If you would just give me a few hours in the gym with you, I could show you exactly what to do."

"Jerry, you are absolutely insane," Julia exclaimed with a groan. "And to make matters worse, I am beyond deranged to put up with you."

Jerry fought back his mirth in order to speak. "Now darling, last week you said you were a maniac to stay with me, now it is deranged. Which is worse?"

The color of Julia's eyes went from sapphire to navy signaling to Jerry that he had achieved the desired result of making her agitated enough to allow her emotions to fight back. "You're angry, now let it out, Julia. Don't let it control you, let it go."

"Yes, I'm angry," she exclaimed in a wavering voice. "Are you satisfied now?" Jerry remained silent and waited for Julia to continue which she did a moment later. "I hate this day. I hate this day and what it means." The words came out involuntarily as did the tears that burned in Julia's eyes. For a moment, all her emotions overwhelmed her and it was if something deep inside her took over. She found her fists pounding against Jerry's chest as her voice shook with sobs. "It's not fair, damn it. It's just not fair."

"I know it's not, kiddo, I know." Jerry pulled Julia into his arms as her fists went from pounding his chest to clutching onto the denim material of his shirt. "I'm right here." As the sobs racked through Julia's body, Jerry rubbed her back with his right hand. Even knowing how upset she was, he could not stop the smile from forming on his face as he held her. She was allowing him to see more and more glimpses of her innermost feelings and nothing made him happier or gave him more relief.

After a few minutes, Julia pulled back from his embrace. "I don't even know what happened there." Her face registered a look of mortification. "I'm SO sorry, you must think that I am a raving lunatic. Are you all right?"

"Hey," Jerry said softly as he lifted up her chin. "You have nothing to apologize for. You're in pain and you're angry and you have every right to be both of those things." His fingers combed through her long blonde curls. "Besides, you're my raving lunatic."

"Sometimes I think I'm losing my mind," Julia mumbled as she tried to control her breathing.

"You're not losing your mind, you're trusting yourself enough to let that anger out and allow the rest of us to see it," Jerry explained as he sighed in utter relief. "You're trusting me enough to see all of you, including the pain and anger."

Julia suddenly became conscious that even through the material of Jerry's shirt, her fingernails were digging into her palms. She unclenched her fists as she muttered aloud, "Damn it."

Jerry picked up an empty clay pot still sitting beside the bench from Julia's geranium planting the day before. "Have at it then, see how far the pieces can fly as they bounce across the slate."

"That's not necessary." The tightness in her jaw relaxed a bit as Julia felt the corner of her mouth curve up into a small smile. "It takes having Rose here during week and me the rest of the time to clean up after you around here as it is. I certainly don't need to make any more work."

"Well, what if I tell you this one's on me," he proposed as a smirk covered his face.

"On you, as in cleaning up ANYTHING?" Julia shook her head in incredulity. "Jerry, you don't even know where the broom is kept, let alone know how to use one."

"And it's bloody hell going to stay that way," he quipped. "But now we have confirmation that you REALLY aren't losing your mind."

Her emotions felt like they were being led through a roller coaster ride as she sat there. "You may have to keep reminding me of that, especially today."

"That's not a problem," Jerry replied as he caressed her neck. "You just keep letting me know how you feel and I mean all of it. I married a woman, flesh and soul, not a porcelain statue which was supposed to personify some image of perfection your father insisted upon for you."

"I really do understand that most of the time," she declared with a sigh. "This morning, it just seemed to have slipped away from me. Melanie even warned me about it and it still caught me by surprise."

Jerry let out a deep exhale as he looked at her. "We don't have to do this today. I can make a quick stop to see Lady Jane and then come back here and we can do whatever you want."

"As much as I love you for worrying about me, that's not going to solve anything, Jerry." Julia flashed him an appreciative smile. "Both Brenda and Jane called me three days ago to suggest the same thing and I declined. It seems that they both knew before I did how difficult today would be and they wanted to spare me."

"Well, they love you too," he remarked with a reassuring smile. "Almost as much as I do."

"I know," Julia said as she bobbed her head slightly. "I need all of that today too." An extended exhale passed from her lips as she leaned back against the bench. "Do you know that until a few years ago, I never thought this day would ever mean anything to me? Now, here I am wondering how to get through it."

Jerry put his arm around her shoulder as he prodded Julia to open up to him. "Go on. Please."

Julia gathered her thoughts before she continued. "My mother died so early on and Veronica was certainly not looking for Mothers' Day celebrations. I did not understand even the concept of it and even five years ago, I never expected for the day to ever matter to me." Her voice wavered a bit with emotion. "Then Jillian came along and you became such a part of me and nothing was the same."

"I know that feeling," Jerry exclaimed with a shake of his head. "My life changed forever then as well."

"It was like I took one look at you and the pure joy that little girl brought to you and everyone around her and it was as if some locked door finally opened up inside me. I felt emotions I never knew were there." Julia swallowed the lump that had suddenly formed in her throat again. "Now I'm afraid those emotions will never be shared and will instead, suffocate everything around them."

Jerry tightened the grip of his arm around her. "That's not going to happen, you won't let it. You've worked to hard to get to where you are right now." He squeezed her shoulder in reassurance. "We still have some things to work through about us but after that, we'll figure out what to do to make this day a celebration."

Julia leaned her head against Jerry's shoulder. "It's not supposed to be this hard."

"I know it's not," Jerry conceded as he stroked her hair. "I'm sorry, kiddo."

She spoke in a voice just above a whisper. "Do you know that when I spoke to Brenda yesterday, I could tell that a part of her was dreading today? Is that ever going to stop for her? She has three beautiful children to love but her heart knows there are supposed to be four and just exactly how devastating that loss is." Julia took a deep breath to regain control of her emotions. "How does one ever come to terms with that? It's not supposed to be this hard for her and Jax either."

"They're going to get through this and so are we," Jerry murmured as he kissed the top of her head. "Life doesn't play fair but regardless of that fact, the Barrett/Jacks teams play to win. Don't you forget that."

"Never," Julia replied as she looked up at him and smiled. "I promise." She nestled her head deeper into Jerry's chest as he held her tightly in his embrace. It was the closest Jerry had felt to her since before their separation and the flip-flop of his heart made him smile. Some "dark clouded days" really did have silver linings.

The Jacks Residence -- 2:00pm

The house was now quiet after the morning festivities as Jane and Brenda had been rewarded with a Mother's Day breakfast, balloons and other gifts. Jillian had been convinced that she would be a much better croquet player against Uncle Jerry after a rest and Jessica and Jonathan were down for their afternoon naps. Brenda had come upstairs to check on the twins and now was in the study deciding the best place for the framed picture of the children to be situated on the wall of family photographs. The picture was from Easter and Jax had arranged for enlargements to be made for Brenda and Jane as their gifts from the children.

Brenda held the frame against the wall close to the window and knew she had found the perfect place for the new addition to the mural of family memories. Her eyes drifted over the various images on the wall again and Brenda felt a familiar overflowing of joy in her heart, followed by a momentary twinge from the heaviness in her chest. She lowered the frame in front of her and her finger traced the three bright faces in the photo. "I love you, my angels." As if to imitate the merger of the joy and the grieving heaviness in her heart, Brenda's mouth curved into a small smile as a tear rolled down her cheek. She placed the picture frame on the table and stood in front of the window that looked out into the side yard. There in the brilliant sunshine, Jamie's pine tree stood tall.

She reached inside the collar of her shirt and pulled out the diamond and ruby heart pendant that Jax had given her after the birth of the twins. Brenda lovingly stroked the pad of her thumb against the ruby heart in the center as she looked up into the dazzling blue sky. Her pledge was made in a mere whisper. "Mommy loves you too, Jamie, and I always will." More tears trickled down her face as she cradled the jewel in her hand. "You know that, don't you, my sweet angel?"

An extended sigh of relief fell from her lips as Brenda then sensed Jax's presence in the room. Brenda turned her head to glance over her shoulder and she saw him standing just inside the door. As had become their trademark, their gazes communicated volumes and Brenda's eyes responded in the negative to Jax's query as to whether she wanted to be alone. Jax crossed the room in five steps and then enveloped her in his arms. His lips kissed away the remnants of the tears along the side of her face. "I love you sweetie and so do all four of our angels. And they know just how much you love them all."

Brenda murmured as she rested her head against Jax's chest. "Even Jamie, right?"

"Especially Jamie," Jax assuredly replied as he stepped slightly away from Brenda in order to be able to look directly into her eyes. Jamie's right here so he knows exactly how much you love him," Jax said as he lifted Brenda's hand and placed it against her heart. "That love will help you today."

No mountain's too high for you to climb
All you have to do is have some climbing faith, oh yes
No rivers too wide for you to make it through
All you have to do is believe it when you pray

And then you will see
The morning will come
And everyday will be bright as the sun
So all your fears
Cast them on me
All I ever wanted was you to see

I'll be your cloud up in the sky
I'll be your shoulder when you cry
I'll hear your voices when you call me
I am your Angel

Brenda's shoulders relaxed at the understanding of the truth of Jax's loving words. "Thank you. I needed the reminder today." She took a deep breath before continuing. "Do you know how many times today that I have looked out at his tree hoping to see Snowflake as some type of assurance of that? How crazy is that?"

"It's not crazy at all." Jax tucked a strand of hair behind Brenda's ear as he spoke. "We may not be able to see him but we know he's out there somewhere watching out for all of us."

"Of course he is," Brenda responded with a smile. "Jamie made sure you were here with me now."

"That's because our son loves you almost as much as I do," Jax asserted as he took Brenda in his arms again. "Jamie's going to always love us just like we are always going to love him."

Brenda nodded her head against Jax's chest. "You're right. I can feel Jamie's love right now in my heart and coming straight through you." She sighed peacefully as she wrapped her arms tightly around Jax. "That love will get me through the day and then help your mother and Julia with what they need today as well. The power of angels."

"Exactly," Jax whispered as he kissed the top of her head. "And Jamie's our very own special angel."

And when all hope is gone, I'm near
Now matter how far you are, I'm near
It makes no difference who you are
I am your Angel
I'm your Angel, oh yes

The beautiful spring afternoon wore on and two hours later, the entire Jacks family was outdoors enjoying the clement weather. Jax had prepared the barbecue to begin grilling dinner while Jerry was acting as bartender. Jane was sitting on the patio with a dozing Jessica in her arms as Julia and Brenda joined her. Jillian was blowing bubbles for Lady to chase in the yard as John followed behind his eldest granddaughter, bouncing an amused Jonathan into the air with each step they took.

Brenda gave John a thumbs up sign as he and Jonathan bounded past the patio. "That's it, Dad, keep him moving and wear him out."

Jax looked up from the racks he was putting on the grill and motioned to his father. "Just keep the peanut facing outward for when he decides to show you his Mt. Vesuvius imitation."

"It's too late for that, he nailed Dad five minutes after I arrived," Jerry announced with a snicker. "The kid moved up two notches in my book with that one."

"You have a book? Why?" A cheshire grin covered Jax's face. "Who reads it to you?"

"I can read, Daddy," Jillian offered as she suddenly stopped next to the steps leading to the patio. "I know how to find A's and I's in my book. I's like the `me' kind." She then looked over at Jerry. "But not these kind of I's," Jillian declared as she pointed at her right eye. "Ms. Sarah says they look different and we don't know how to find 'em yet."

Jerry rolled his eyes slightly as Jillian grinned at him and then began chasing Lady again with the bubbles. He pointed his finger at Jax. "You've turned her into a geek already, Jasper."

"You're just jealous, Jer," Brenda said with a devilish glint in her eyes.

"That's right," Jax remarked with a smug smile. "Pretty soon, you'll be back to having the lowest IQ in the family again."

Jane and Julia both laughed softly and Jerry glared at the two of them. "Such so-called support from my mother and wife."

"It's Mother's Day, Jeremiah, so I have the day off," responded Jane as she smiled at Jessica's cooing.

"And I don't recall anything in our marriage vows about giving you a hand to support that colossal ego of yours," Julia declared with a shrug.

Brenda looked up at Jerry with a look of complete sincerity on her face. "Oh, Jerry, don't fret. I'll gladly give you a hand in support." At that Brenda clapped her hands together and shot him an impish grin. "There you go, no thanks are even necessary."

At the sound of Jax's deep chuckle combined with Brenda's glee, Jessica flailed her arms in the air and laughed out loud.

"You've even corrupted the munchkin already," Jerry announced with a jagged sigh as he motioned his hand toward Brenda. While a flurry of laughter rang through the air, Jerry glanced at Jax and shook his head. "You know, Jasper, if I even liked you one iota, I would feel sorry for you for having had to put up with that shrew you call a wife for so long but you two deserve each other."

Jax put his hand over his heart to emphasize the dramatics. "Aaahhh thanks, Jer. We think so too."

"You both are complete psychos and the rest of this family is close to that now," Jerry declared as he poured himself a drink. "I can just imagine the headlines now, conglomerate incinerates as family melts down."

Jax patted Jerry on the back. "Don't worry, Jillian will read them to you."

"Complete loons, every single one you," Jerry muttered aloud as the patio again erupted in mirth.

Jillian then appeared on the steps requesting another croquet game with Jerry and he took the opportunity to get away from the ribbing hour. Julia joined Jillian as her partner and told her that this time, Uncle Jerry would not beat them.

As John and Jonathan played referees for the croquet game, Jax went inside to get the steaks and shrimp for the barbecue. Jane and Brenda remained on the patio with Jessica who was enjoying her grandmother's attentive cuddling. Brenda clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth and cooed at the baby. Jane's face gleamed as she looked down at Jessica's beaming smile. "Jessica Noelle, you are absolutely adorable. And you use that to get exactly what you want, don't you?"

"Yes, she certainly does," replied Brenda as she cooed again at Jessica. "Especially with her daddy." Brenda then reached down and touched Jane's hand. "And she also knows what her grandmother needs, particularly today."

"That is definitely the truth," Jane murmured with a nod of her head. "She picks up on her surroundings and the feelings of those around her immediately."

She gave Jane's hand a comforting squeeze. "Jessica does seem to know how to read what the people who love her need. She is just like Jax in that regard and I'm so glad." Brenda looked down at Jessica and then up at Jane again. "I thinks she looks so much like you and she's been so comfortable with you from the beginning. Something tells me that the two of you are going to have something very special."

A bright smile covered Jane's face as Jessica grasped her finger. "Well, I remember when Jessica was just a few weeks old thinking how much she looked like the image I always had in my head of Jeanette. She's so beautiful."

"Thank you," Brenda graciously murmured before looking out into the yard to see the progress of the game. She smiled at the sight of Jonathan's grins as Julia tickled his feet and then turned to Jane again. "How does Julia seem to you today?"

"Okay for someone trying to understand how one can be happy and sad at the same time," Jane answered. "That's not an easy lesson."

"One of the toughest," Brenda acknowledged with a shake of her head. "Two years I couldn't even get out of bed on this day."

Jane laid her palm atop Brenda's hand as she spoke. "That was a lifetime ago now and look at you now." She flashed Brenda a lopsided grin. "We'll just all hope that Julia will be able to say that same one day and she and Jerry will understand just what the joy of having a family really means."

"Oh, I hope so," Brenda declared in a soft tone as she looked out into the yard again at the sound of Jonathan's laughter. He was putting on a real show for Julia this afternoon as she played a game of peek-a-boo with him. "Well, she found an adoring fan today in Jonathan."

"Julia will find what she needs to get through today just like we all will." Jane lifted Jessica into the air. "Won't we, Miss spoiled and beautiful Jessica?"

"And Miss feisty temper," Brenda quickly added with a snicker. "Jax said, between you and I, our daughters could not avoid that feistiness but Jillian's was nothing compared to Jessica's. The poor thing had to be crowded by that bigger brother of hers for too long it seems."

Soft laughter escaped from Jane's lips. "Well, who could blame her, especially after seeing the way her brother eats now, just like his father did. But he does have that same sweet disposition," Jane said with a smile.

"The peanut certainly has that," Brenda agreed with a bob of her head. "Jonathan would eat every hour and never sleep if he could but he's such a happy and even tempered child."

"He's just like Jax was, such a sweet little boy," Jane remarked as she tickled Jessica's stomach.

Jax closed the french doors behind him as he came outside again. "See, I always told Jerry that I was the sweet one."

"Yes, but you didn't sleep either and ate like you had never been fed before," Jane reminded him.

Jessica gurgled and Brenda grabbed the baby's flailing leg. "Yes, we're talking about your brother and your daddy. Now if Jonathan would sleep as well as you do and you could be as calm as he is, life would be much easier."

"But what fun would that be, sweetie?" Jax chuckled as he put the steaks on the grill.

"I know, honey," she answered with a sigh. "That would much too boring for us."

Jax winked at her and then looked out into the yard to watch the last portion of the croquet game rematch. A few minutes later, Jillian bounded up the steps to the patio. "Mommy and Daddy, we winned. Me and Aunt Julia winned."

"Congratulations Jillian," Brenda announced as she hugged Jillian. "Did you hit the ball far just like Daddy showed you?"

"Uh-huh," Jillian exclaimed as she nodded. "Me and Aunt Julia hit the red ball sooo far and Uncle Jerry knocked down a wigget."

Jax moved over to Jillian and put out his hand so she could give him a high five. "Princess, that's called a wicket and I saw you and Aunt Julia hit your ball through the last three wickets so it tapped the pole."

"Then we winned," Jillian excitedly added as she clapped her hands.

Julia walked onto the terrace carrying Jonathan. "Yes, we did even though Uncle Jerry is still blaming Lady for interference."

"That sounds like Uncle Jerry but we all know the truth," quipped Jax as he patted Jillian on the back. "Okay, Jillian, I need to get back to the grill and you know the rules about staying over there."

Jillian nodded her head. "Yeah, me and Lady gotta stay away from the fire." She looked over at the platters Jax had just brought outside. "What are you gonna cook?

"Steak and shrimp on the barbie," Jax responded with a grin as he moved back over to the grill. "How does that sound?"

"Yum," Jillian replied as she licked her lips. She looked up at Julia and started to giggle. "Daddy's gonna cook shrimp on the barbie but that's the fire, not my Barbie doll. You can't cook on her."

Julia nodded. "No, you can't and we wouldn't want her to get near the fire and get hurt either."

Jillian bobbed her head up and down as she waved her finger in the air. "No fire and no matches and no candles 'cause they'll burn and hurt a lot."

Brenda stood up and motioned for Jillian to come over and sit down next to Jane. "That's right, sweetheart, I'm glad you remember all of that. Now, I'll get you some lemonade and then I'm going to take your brother upstairs to change him."

"I'll take him upstairs, Brenda," offered Julia. "You just stay here."

She moved next to Julia and grinned at Jonathan as she softly spoke. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure," Julia whispered in return. "You're sure and you can do this today," Julia's mind tried to reinforce to her. She then lifted Jonathan so that he was looking directly at her face. "Is it okay if I take you upstairs now, handsome?"

As if he understood Julia's words and knew every ache in her heart today, Jonathan thrust his arms outward and his right hand made contact with Julia's cheek. His small fingers seemed to almost pat her face, as if to offer comfort. Julia was taken by such surprise at fluttering in her heart from Jonathan's touch that a small gasp fell from her lips. The simultaneous sound of a gasp was also heard from Brenda's lips at the sight of her son's response.

Jax had watched the entire exchange and was smiling himself as he spoke to Julia. "That's a definite yes since the peanut has reserved his love pats for only his mother until now."

"Well, I'm truly honored then," Julia murmured in an emotional voice. She caught sight of Jerry who had come up the steps to the patio a minute before and had witnessed the entire scene. She flashed Jerry a smile before cradling Jonathan against her shoulder. "Well Master Jonathan, let's go then."

A radiant beam appeared on Brenda's face as she waved to Julia and Jonathan as they headed inside. A shining grin formed on Jane's lips and Brenda saw a similar expression on Jerry's face. Brenda then caught Jax's gaze and her eyes sparkled with joy. Everything they had talked about earlier had been true. Brenda could feel Jamie all around them and she knew that he had been there to help Jane and Julia and her through the day.

I saw your teardrops, and I heard you cry
All you need is time
Seek me and you shall find
You have everything and you're still alone
It doesn't have to be this way
Let me show you a better day

Oh and then you will see
The morning will come
And all of your days will be bright as the sun
All of your fears
All of your fears
Just cast them on me
How can I make you see

I'll be your cloud up in the sky
I'll be your shoulder when you cry
I'll hear your voices when you call me
I am your Angel

He was loving all of them through their angels on earth. Brenda lifted her eyes up to the sky and whispered in loving gratitude for her Mother's Day gift. None could have ever meant more to her as she knew they had their own angel loving them from above.

And when all hope is gone, I'm near
Now matter how far you are, I'm near
It makes no difference who you are
I am your Angel

Monday, May 27, 2002
The Quartermaine Estate -- 1:30pm

The annual Memorial Day picnic was well underway as music, food, laughter and fun were plentiful on the grounds of the Quartermaine estate. The weather had cooperated with a clear and sunny day and the pool had been heated and opened for the season to be enjoyed by those willing to brave the cool breeze. Edward was playing the role of the cantankerous host as was his forte while Lila was her usual charming and gracious hostess.

Brenda got up from the blanket and checked the swing to find Jonathan still soundly sleeping. The fresh air seemed to be the best weapon these days to lull him to sleep. Anthony was asleep in a playpen under the trees next to the swing. Brenda went back to the blanket and sat down next to Jillian and Brooke who were eating hamburgers and pretzels. Jessica had already awakened from her nap and was wiggling all over the blanket as Lois dangled a toy in front of the baby. "That's it hon, you can grab it."

"Better that than your hair," Brenda warned. "Those tiny hands have a death grip. The dog was her victim this morning."

Jillian sighed out loud. "Poor Lady, now she’s gonna have a hole in her skin."

"Not exactly, Jillian," Brenda said with a smile. "But we'll be more careful when Lady is around Jessica just like you will remember about not ever using the scissors unless Mommy or Daddy or another adult is around."

"I remember," Jillian declared in a small voice. "No more holes in my hair and no more scissors."

Brenda nodded. "Thank you. Now I think you should thank Aunt Lois again for fixing your hair the other day."

"Thank you Aunt Lois for making my hair pretty." She then looked at Lois with a pout. "Mommy put my new puzzle away 'cause I used the scissors and Daddy says I can't play in the pool today cause I didn't listen."

Lois cleared her throat and suppressed her grin at the sulk on Jillian's face. It was the same sulk she had seen on Brenda at times. "You're welcome Jillian and those punishments will help you to remember that your mommy and daddy don't want you to hurt yourself."

"Daddy telled me the scissors'll hurt me." Before continuing, Jillian looked up at Brenda who smiled at her again. "Daddy and Mommy aren't mad now."

Brenda ran her hand through Jillian's curls which now were much thinner and shorter on top. "Sweetheart, all Mommy and Daddy want is for you to listen to what we say and we get unhappy when you don't because we're afraid you will get hurt. That would make us so upset because we love you. That is why we were both unhappy but that is over. You've been punished and we expect you to obey the rules."

"I'm gonna obey," Jillian pledged. "I don't like being punished and I wanna go to the party."

Lois winked at her. "That's right, you have only one more day of pre-school and then graduation on Wednesday."

Jillian excitedly bobbed her head up and down. "Mommy says I can wear my pretty pink dress and then there's ice cream and cake. Daddy's gonna take my picture too."

Brenda looked over at Brooke. "We went to your graduation last year and I remember just how pretty you looked."

"Grandma bought me a pretty hat to wear," Brooke said proudly.

Lois nodded and then muttered under her breath to Brenda. "That's because I couldn't begin to fix the disaster she did to her hair with the scissors the week before. At least your kid cut the side, mine chopped off half of the hair in front of her head."

Brenda choked back her mirth at Lois' comments. Two days ago she had found little humor in the situation but a few hours of sleep and some better perspective had helped Brenda to understand that this was all part of the growing pains they would be experiencing for at least the next twenty years.

Jillian finished her hamburger and looked up at Brenda. "Mommy, is Daddy gonna bring us watermelon? I'm all done."

"Me too," Brooke chimed in return. "Then after the watermelon, we get to watch the softball game."

"Yes, the game will be in a little while and you both can cheer and help watch the little ones while we play. Your fathers are bringing back food, including the watermelon, but they obviously took a detour." Brenda rolled her eyes slightly as she looked at Lois. "Gee, I wonder what they're doing?"

A loud laugh escaped from Lois' lips. "Why do I envision Jax telling Mr. Q that he is his long last cousin and asking for his share of ELQ with Ned pulling out the doctored family tree to prove it?"

Brenda shook her head. "No, that was last month. Something tells me that Jax is waving Lila's stock certificates in Edward's face and they have all been endorsed over to him and Ned has the stock book to fill out the transfer."

"Oh, I'd pay to see that one," Lois quipped. "All we'd need was Jerry there with a writer from The Wall Street Journal and I think Eddie would be speechless for the first time in his life."

Brenda looked out toward the pool house where the food was being served and saw Julia with Scott and Francesca. "Well, Jerry is missing now too so heaven knows what torture they are inflicting."

Jillian then looked over and saw Lucy holding onto Bryndie's hands as the toddler took a few steps in the grass toward them. "Look, Bryndie can walk now."

"She's getting there, Jillian," Lucy responded as they reached the blanket. "Bryndie still needs to hold on right now but very soon, she will be chasing you and Brooke."

"Look how big she's gotten," Lois remarked as she waved at the rosy-cheeked toddler.

"There's another one who is growing up so fast," Brenda added as she picked up Jessica who had started to fuss. "With a big first birthday coming up in just two weeks."

Lucy took a deep breath and nodded. "Yes, and planning for that and the Nurses Ball all at the same time is having its moments. Being out of commission for part of this last year made me forget about how time consuming some of these details can be."

Brenda lifted her eyebrow and smirked as she spoke. "And I guess having Katherine to take over some of the duties again is out of the question?"

"NO way," Lucy retorted quickly. "Kathy is NOT touching this event this year. I am still forced to listen to that woman's raving about the money raised last year as if she did ALL the work. I am going to blow her socks out of the water this year if it is the last thing I do."

"Well, all this is being done purely for the sake of the charity, of course," inquired Lois as she fought off the smug smile threatening to form on her lips.

"Of course, and the show is going to be incredible, if I do say so myself," replied Lucy. "But, if ancillary to that, Ms. Kathy gets knocked down a notch, what can I do about it?"

"Absolutely nothing," Brenda countered with a bright grin.

"But I do need so much help from my crew and my stars," Lucy admitted as she continued to hold Bryndie's hands while the toddler walked on and off the blanket. "Now where is that husband of yours, so I can convince him that without his cute behind on stage, I am sunk."

Brenda chuckled at Lucy's reference. "His cute behind will be back shortly."

"Okay, we'll catch you on the next lap," Lucy announced as Bryndie began walking toward the trees. "Maria Andretti is on the move."

"Can we walk with her too," questioned Brooke and Jillian. "Then we can eat watermelon."

Lucy nodded as Bryndie began to pick up her pace. "Of course you may. We're off."

Five minutes later, the watermelon, other food and several cute behinds arrived as Jax, Ned and Jerry finally made their way to the blanket. Lois looked up at the dimpled grin on Ned's face and shook her head. "Have you fellas been having fun?"

Ned tipped his head to Lois as he sat down two plates of food. "Don't we always when Grandfather is around?"

"So what did you three tag team him with this time?" Brenda asked.

"It was perfect," Jerry replied as he motioned toward Julia that they were back with the food. "Ashton tells Eddie that he has a confession to make and that he has to leave Lois for the only person that has ever made him feel truly complete and in touch with his own true being."

Lois turns her head to face Ned and waves her red glittered nails toward him. "And that person is?"

"Me," responded Jax with a cheshire grin on his face. "Sorry Lois, but Nedley just can't keep it a secret any longer. As we told Edward, it's just destiny."

Brenda buried her head against Jessica's cheek as she laughed. "You've got to be kidding? You didn't really tell him that?"

"Oh, it was priceless," countered Ned. "Then Jerry motions to Grandmother...." Ned was laughing so hard that he could not continue.

Jax found his voice long enough to finish Ned's story. "Then Lila, in all her grace and charm, comes over and says she wished us well and that hearts are meant to be followed."

Lois covered her face with her hands as she laid back on the blanket in hysterics. "Oh, my sainted aunts, this is just too rich."

"That vein in Eddie's neck looked like it was going to blow like one of the gushers off the Anchorage site," Jerry exclaimed. "I think that scowl is now frozen on his face."

Jax rubbed his hands together and chuckled. "Well, that scowl will be perfect for Edward's role as umpire in the softball game later so we did him a favor."

"You three really have to learn how to enjoy yourselves," suggested Brenda with a smirk.

"Yes, it seems so," Julia agreed as she laughed. "Someone has to be able to teach you all how to have fun."

Jax sat down next to Brenda and finally stopped chuckling. "Well, the old coot is fine, just fuming and threatening to have us all committed or jailed, I can't remember what his last spouts were."

"Both, I believe," Ned said in response. "Committed first and then jailed."

"Where are the girls, sorry the bigger girls," Jax queried as he held out his finger for Jessica to grasp.

"Taking a walk," Brenda replied, purposely not mentioning the fact that they were with Lucy.

Lois exchanged a scheming look with Brenda. "Let's eat before we are invaded or the boys wake up."

Twenty minutes later, Brenda saw Lucy and the girls approaching the blanket. She quickly lowered her gaze back down to her plate and then Jillian and Brooke called out for Jax and Ned. Jax groaned as he looked up and saw Lucy heading toward them. Jerry began to snicker at the look on Jax's face. "Hey little brother, you're trapped."

Jax glared at him while Brenda bit her lip at the look on Jax's face. Jillian came over to him. "Daddy, me and Brooke helped Bryndie walk. Now can we eat watermelon?"

He motioned to the two plates of watermelon in the corner of the blanket. "I'm sure Aunt Lucy appreciated your help and your watermelon is right over there."

Lucy lifted Bryndie into her arms and sighed dramatically as she looked at Jax. "There you are, now about the Nurses Ball, do you prefer the first act or the second. It's your choice."

"Lucy," Jax began before her chattering interrupted him.

"Now, as always, Alan will start the show. Since we are going with the musical theater theme, the first act will open up with Alan singing `Some Enchanted Evening.' That is my favorite selection from `South Pacific,’ isn't it yours?"

Jax opened his mouth to speak but Lucy's gabbing began again with a flurry. "Now as far as the rest of the show, some numbers are already finalized so I want to be sure we stick to just one selection from either the Broadway show or the Hollywood musical so as soon as you and Brenda decide, let me know." She then pointed at Lois and Ned as she continued to babble. "Now, Lois and Ned and going with `Summer Nights' from `Grease' so nothing else from that show. I think the production number we'll use to end the first act will be `Seasons of Love' from `Rent,’ the words behind that are so perfect for the Ball. Of course the ending ensemble piece will be `One' from `A Chorus Line' so we are sticking right with tradition there. For me, right now I am leaning toward doing a production number from `Hello Dolly' with the ensemble and then something from `Cabaret' in the second act. Now how does all of that sound?"

"Just perfect, Lucy," Brenda replied as she watched Jax out of the corner of her eye. He looked like he had just had the wind knocked out of him, either that or Lucy had taken all the oxygen out of the air as she chattered without ever seeming to take a breath. Brenda then cleared her throat and smiled at Lucy. "It sounds like a wonderful evening, especially with so many people involved this year."

Lucy nodded her head. "Oh yes, and so much of that is thanks to you and Lois. I can't tell you what difference this is going to make with L&B's three hottest acts agreeing to appear. The fact that Miguel is coming back to town to treat us to one of his numbers from `Les Miserables' and then Ingo performing as well as Ned, will mean so much for the new pediatric AIDS wing. With the new amphitheater completed now and agreeing to reduce its fee for our use and then the publicity we are getting from the press, it is going to be a night no one will ever forget. The place will be standing room only."

Jax finally was able to clear his head from the incessant clamoring of Lucy's voice. "New amphitheater, press, standing room only, professional performers and then him up there on stage, there was no way that was going to happen," he thought to himself. "No way under the sun." Jax looked up at Lucy and flashed her a bright smile. "Lucy, no one can ever accuse you of not throwing yourself full force into a project and I know all of Port Charles and the hospital and all the foundations will never be able to thank you enough for all your tremendous efforts."

"Trying to pull this off with the use of that trademark charm, aren't you, Mr. Jacks", Brenda thought as she sat there. "Not this time, honey," Brenda murmured to herself as she shook her head and motioned to Lucy. Jerry caught the exchange and turned his head to hide his smirk.

Lucy broke in on Jax's little speech. "Well, thank you, Jax, and the fact that unselfish and generous citizens like you are so willing to help makes this all worth it. Now you and Brenda can do whatever you want, singing, dancing...."

"Lucy," Jax said as he put up his hand to stop her latest diatribe. "I'll write you any size check you want and I'll make any speech you compose, I'll even sell tickets but me singing up on that stage is not going to happen. I'm a corporate raider and a businessman, I am not a performer."

"Oh, come on, Jax," Jerry quipped with a devilish glint in his eyes. "You were the giraffe in the Christmas play and you danced. Or was that little jig because you had to use the facilities?"

Ned snorted and Lois elbowed him to stop before she got up to get Anthony who was now awake in his playpen. Brenda and Lucy still had the final stage to get through before the frivolity started.

Lucy merely flashed Jax a smile and shrugged. "Jax, you underestimate yourself, a talented and handsome man such as yourself has nothing to worry about. The women will simply be mesmerized by those blue starbursts you have where the rest of us have mere eyes and the men will be ogling Brenda. If the song is not perfect, it will go unnoticed. You will be great up there on stage."

Lucy smiled at Lila and then turned back to Jax. "Now what was I just telling you, Jax? You will be perfect up there. I need you up there. The kids need you up there. Now am I going to have to beg?"

"You don't want Lucy to beg, Jax. Trust me, I've seen it and it will bring tears to your eyes," Brenda murmured to him as she threaded her fingers through the hair on the back of his head. "It will be a wonderful evening and we'll have so much fun and Jillian will help us practice."

As if on cue, Jillian was suddenly at his right shoulder. "Yeah Daddy, I can help you and turn on the music." She then put her chin on his shoulder. Please Daddy, I'll clap real, real loud."

Jerry did not think he could stand it any longer. "Where was the movie camera when he needed it," he thought. "Little brother, you've been played like a violin by four virtuosos ranging in age from four to eighty-four."

"For the love of....," Jax stopped with a groan. "Fine, you win. I can't fend off four of you at once but I am well aware of what each of you is doing." He turned and locked his gaze with Brenda's. "Especially you. You scripted this from the start."

"Oh, thank you," Brenda murmured as she hugged him. "I promise it won't be horrible."

"If it is, you will never hear the end of it," Jax whispered back to her. "And I mean NEVER. I will also have you know that I WILL have the final say in whatever we do up there and I am not going to do anything as some Austrian captain."

Brenda softly laughed as Jax released her from his embrace. Lila winked at her as Reggie then wheeled her back to Edward and Brenda gave Jillian a thumbs up sign for a job well done. Jax glared at Ned who was now laughing raucously and Jerry who was looking way too comfortable and pleased with the turn of events. A smirk then appeared on Jax's lips as he turned to Lucy. "You know Lucy, if you really want to sell some tickets, you would get my brother up on stage. Now that would be a sight."

"Well, I would love to do that. I have been trying to get you for the past four years so you were my goal for this year and I put Jerry down on my list for next year for a Jacks brothers act. But since you brought it up..."

Jerry put up his hand to stop her. "No, one Jacks is enough. More than enough in fact."

"He's right, Lucy," Julia declared. "Jax will be a fine representative this year for the family."

Jerry gave Jax a gloating smile. At least his wife was not throwing him to the queen wolf.

"My brother is just shy, he would love to perform. I am sure of it." Jax then caught a glance exchanged between Brenda and Julia and chuckled to himself. "Just think you can bill it as two Barrett/Jacks acts."

"What an idea," Lucy exclaimed with an excited sigh. "I can just see it now in the papers."

"No, you can't do that," Julia responded in an almost fearful tone. "You don't want Jerry on stage."

Lucy's face displayed a confused look. "I don't? Why?"

Julia looked at Brenda and then Lois and Ned who were awaiting the answer along with Lucy. Julia motioned for Lucy to come closer to her as she loudly whispered her response. "He's terrible, there is nothing Jerry can do on-stage that won't embarrass him."

"What?" Jerry looked at Julia as if she had lost her mind. "How do you know what I would want to do on stage?"

"Jerry, I love you but you could not carry a tune if you were holding a bucket. Not even in the shower can you sing. And as far as dancing, there is nothing rhythmic about those feet at all. I mean not at all. I am just trying to save you from making a fool of yourself."

"So you are saying it in front of these jokers here," Jerry groaned as he looked at Lois, Ned, Brenda and that smirking baby brother of his. "First of all, it is not even true, not in the slightest."

"You can't sing in the shower, Jerry, I've heard you." Jax shook his head and sighed. "My God, even Lady howled when you stayed at the house last and tried to sing."

"That beast did no such thing," countered Jerry. "At least I was a camel in the Christmas pageant, an authentic animal in Bethlehem. You were some ridiculous giraffe that just reinforced what a dork you were."

Jax sneered at him. "So you were a camel, you spit, what kind of talent is that?"

"I will put my camel up to your giraffe any day of the week," Jerry retorted. "You are the one with no talent, not me."

Lucy mentally crossed another name off her list as she spoke. "So Jerry, you are saying that you have some talent then?"

"Of course," he professed with a wave of his hand. "And a lot more than baby boy Jacks over there."

"Great, then I'll add you and Julia to the program tomorrow," Lucy announced. "This is even better than I ever expected."

The scope of his actions and the events surrounding them then hit Jerry like a tons of bricks. He glared at Julia. "You set me up."

"Me?" Julia replied with a smile.

Lucy knew her cue to leave. "Okay, we're off again. Rehearsal starts the end of next week everyone. Ta-ta."

"You set both of us up," Jerry charged as he then looked at Brenda.

"We did?" Brenda asked as she feigned ignorance.

Tears were rolling down Ned's face from laughing so hard and Lois buried her face into the back of Anthony's hair to hide her mirth. "Bested again by the Barrett women I see. They make you look like amateurs."

He scowled at Ned and Julia patted his hand. "Don't worry, it won't always be this way. One day, you'll actually work your way up to the next level."

Brenda nodded her head and winked at him. "Yes, Jerry, second level novice."

As everyone else laughed, Jerry grumbled and Julia then moved into his lap and kissed him fully on the mouth. Jerry rolled his eyes as she laid her head against his shoulder. Jax rocked Brenda in his arms as she held Jessica while Jillian and Brooke entertained Jonathan who had just awakened in his swing. It was a typical day of love and laughter for all of them.

The Jacks Residence -- 10:15pm

Jax carried Jonathan in his infant seat over to the living area of the master suite and placed the seat gently down on the coffee table. He then sat down on the sofa and gingerly propped his left leg up on the table next to the infant seat. Jax then grimaced slightly as he put a table under his ankle to elevate his leg even more. Jonathan stared wide-eyed at his father's actions and then flashed Jax his usual drooling smile.

"Young man, lesson number one about countering a catcher who is blocking home plate is that the hook slide is your best friend." Jax offered his finger to his son who grasped it and cooed. "Now, lesson number two is that a bruised ankle is a small price to pay for scoring the winning run, especially when Uncle Ned is pitching."

Jonathan babbled and smiled as Jax continued his fatherly instructions on life. "Okay, the most important lesson I am going to give you tonight is to never underestimate your opponent, ESPECIALLY if your mother is involved." Jax then grinned and leaned down so that his face was very close to Jonathan's. "Now remember, you can never be fooled by the tenacity, strength or power of small beautiful packages. That's exactly what happened tonight and now Uncle Ned will have to live with that until next Memorial Day when I have no doubt your mother will sail a line drive right over Uncle Ned and Uncle AJ's head yet again."

The baby grinned at Jax's animated expressions and flailed his arms forward, grasping a handful of Jax's hair in the process. "Jessica has been teaching you her tricks, I see," Jax declared as he unclenched Jonathan's fingers. "If your sister has her way, I will be bald before the end of summer."

"Now that would be a sight," Brenda announced as she entered the master suite.

Jax turned his head to see Brenda walking toward him with an ice pack. "So, are both of our hair clipping daughters asleep?"

"Yes, we just have the late night party animal left." Brenda tweaked Jonathan's nose as she sat down on the couch next to Jax. "Now, how is his MVP father's ankle? I brought some more ice."

"As I was telling the peanut, a small price to pay for victory," Jax retorted with a glint in his eyes. "I think I will live."

"Oh, I know you will live," Brenda countered as she leaned forward to get a better look at Jax's ankle and then carefully placed the ice pack atop the bruised area. "That was a nice try but a bruised ankle will heal in ample time to start rehearsal at the end of next week for the Nurses Ball so cross off any plans for that excuse."

Jax snorted at the sight of the arrogant smirk covering Brenda's face. "You're pretty pleased with yourself today, aren't you, Mrs. Jacks?"

She cocked her right eyebrow as she spoke. "That's makes two of us then, Mr. `Game-winning run and backhanded snag for the last out' Jacks." Brenda then continued in a purring tone. "Besides, I know you find my `pleased with myself' moments rather adorable."

"That I do," Jax responded in a voice that could have melted a glacier. "I also know that the biggest mistake anyone could ever make is underestimating you when you decide there is something you want."

"That's why we make such a team," Brenda suggested as reached out and touched Jax's cheek. "You're exactly the same way and you were cognizant of that fact about us from the very start, even before there was truly an us."

Jax shook his head as he brought Brenda's hand to his lips and kissed her fingers. "There was an us almost from the very beginning. You just had to learn how to trust yourself before you could see it."

"You're right," she replied with a deep sigh. "From the first moments in the penthouse after we met, something inside me knew that my life was never going to be the same again. Even though I did not understand it or realize its scope, that place deep inside me knew enough to convince me to meet you at the airport that day." Brenda's voice was filled with emotion as she continued. "Then after that, every day just seemed to become more hopes and dreams, all about us, all about forever."

His eyes sparkled like shimmering sapphires as Jax gazed at her. "You're a silly one, that's how it's supposed to be. You just needed to realize that in your own way and in your own time. And you did."

"But so many people don't," Brenda murmured as she shook her head. "They don't have hopes or they're afraid to dream or they let go before they can reach that point. They're never truly part of an `us' and the saddest part of it all is that they don't even realize what they're missing. They spend their whole lives in search of something that was or could have been with them the whole time and then it is too late. By some twist of fate or stroke of luck or touch of an angel, I found you and you found me and we discovered what happily ever after means."

Jax just looked at Brenda for a moment and then simply smiled. "I remember telling Lady Jane once that you were like a shooting star and you've just re-confirmed that." He gently caressed her neck and shoulder. "Do you have any idea just how much I love you, even if you manipulated me into this Nurses Ball disaster?"

Brenda laughed softly as she flashed him a beaming grin. "I admit I bent the rules a bit and I am sorry for that but I also know that you were well aware of our discussion after the twins were born about performing this year. You said you would consider it so you set yourself up for this campaign."

He grimaced at the memory of the conversation and then rolled his eyes at the look on Brenda's face. "And they say elephants have good memories. You were barely conscious when I said that."

"My poor baby," Brenda cooed as she put Jonathan's pacifier into his mouth and then climbed into Jax's lap. "I promise, I'll find something that will be perfect for us."

"I know what will be perfect for us that has nothing to do with the Nurses Ball." Jax stroked Brenda's back as he held her. "At least, I hope it's perfect for you."

Brenda rested her head against Jax's shoulder. "What honey?"

Jax dropped a baby kiss on her forehead before continuing. "When I talked to Mum this morning, our anniversary came up again. She and Dad want the two of us to have some time alone together and they've offered to take care of the kids."

She nodded her head as she looked up at Jax. "That's very nice of them but I hate for them to come all this way for an evening. Robin has offered to come over so we can spend the evening out."

"Mum is talking about more than the evening," Jax announced. "She and Dad want us to get away for a few days."

"A few days? Just you and I?" Brenda sat up and looked directly at Jax. "Am I hearing you correctly?"

A snicker fell from Jax's lips at Brenda's stunned expression. He spoke slowly and distinctly to ensure Brenda that her hearing was fine. "Yes, just us as in YOU AND I and yes, for the weekend."

"They're serious?" Brenda brightly smiled for a few seconds and then frowned. "But Jax, a few days can feel like a few weeks if either of the twins is out of sorts at all. And if Jillian decides to pull one of her `almost five year old going on two year old' acts, it is even worse. Just running up and down the steps in this house is enough to wear me out at times, especially if the party animal over there is up half the night. Do your parents have a clue what they could be in for?"

He massaged Brenda's shoulder again. "I spoke to both Mum and Dad about that and was first told to stop being a nervous Matilda." Jax grinned at the smile that had appeared again on Brenda's face as he continued. "After that exchange, we spoke logistically and came up with a solution that I think will work if it works for you. What do you think about heading to Malibu after Jillian's graduation and Mum and Dad will meet us and take care of the kids there."

"Malibu," Brenda murmured in a tone barely above a whisper.

Jax squeezed her shoulder as he continued. "Charles and Marie will be there and Marie was a big help with Jillian as a baby and then Jillian will have the beach to entertain her. The house is also much smaller and one level so it won't be as much for Mum and Dad to deal with."

"Malibu?" Brenda repeated as she took a deep breath. "We haven't been there together since.....since life started making sense again."

"I know," Jax replied as he caressed her cheek. "That's why I need this to work for you. Something else can be worked out if...."

"No," Brenda said quickly as she interrupted him. "Malibu should be a place of joyful and happy memories for us so I want us all to be there."

Jax flashed her a lopsided grin. "Well, then what about making our first trip there with the twins on Wednesday evening? Mum and Dad can meet us at the house on Thursday and then Friday, you and I can leave to get away for the weekend."

A myriad of thoughts and emotions raced through Brenda's head. "Just us for a whole weekend? I've never left them..." Brenda exhaled slowly as she looked up at Jax. "They'll have Jillian and your parents and Jessica and Jonathan will know we're coming back, won't they? We're not abandoning them."

Jax cupped Brenda's chin with his hand. "They turned five months old on Saturday and you've loved them and taken care of them every minute of that time so the issue of abandoning anyone is not involved in this equation at all."

"I'm sorry," Brenda muttered as she shook her head and smiled at him. "A momentary attack of maternal guilt or hormones or whatever. I'll miss Jillian and the twins terribly but we've missed so much time together over the past several months that there is nothing more that I'd want to do than spend time for us."

"So, do I take that as a yes?" Jax asked with a twinkle in his eye.

"If Simone says it is okay for the twins to be on an airplane that long then I say let's go," Brenda excitedly said. Her exuberance seemed to intensify with each passing second. "There's so much to do and less than forty-eight hours to do it. We'll be packing half the house and I'll have to get the twins in for a visit with Simone and talk to Charles and Marie about what we need for the house before we get there. I have to call Keesha about the new grants for the Foundation and then there's Jillian's graduation..."

Jax put his fingers up to Brenda's lips to stop the gush. "Sweetie, take a deep breath before you pass out from excitement. Everything will get done. A sexy glint then appeared in Jax's eyes as he finished his thoughts. "Besides, the only thing close to hyperventilating I want to see from you is after we are alone together after getting away for our weekend."

Brenda could feel the grin on her face widening. "Get away where, Mr. Jacks?"

"Sorry, that is not to be disclosed right now. Something has to be a surprise," Jax added with a wink. "I will tell you that we won't be far enough away to prevent us from getting back to Malibu if Mum and Dad decide to surrender."

Lyrical laughter spilled from Brenda's lips and Jax felt his heart flutter at the sound. When she was truly happy, Brenda's laughter sounded like the music of angels to him. Brenda pulled him into a tight hug. Oh, it all sounds perfect."

Jax nuzzled his lips along the side of Brenda's face. "It will be perfect, a whole weekend with just you could not be anything but perfect."

Brenda pulled back from his embrace to look up at Jax. "I don't want to put a crimp in your romantic thoughts but you are going to share me for the weekend. There will have to be three of us wherever we go."

A curious look appeared on Jax's face. "Three of us?"

"Yes," Brenda said as she bobbed her head up and down. With a dramatic exhale, she finished her statement. "You, me and a breast pump. What a story that will make."

"I promise to try not to devote all my attention to the breast pump," Jax teased as he pulled Brenda into a bear hug. "For this weekend, let it find its own siphon on the beach."

They both laughed and Brenda wrapped her arms around Jax's neck. "Jax, I love you so much."

"I love you too, Brenda. And that's forever," Jax whispered as he held her. Whatever it was that caused them to find each other, whether it be fate or luck or the angels above, he would be indebted forever and beyond.

SONG CREDITS: "I'm Your Angel" by R. Kelly